I want her smile, her lips, her hips, I want the twinkle in her eyes

that causes men to lick their lips. I want her class and taste, her charm and

grace, the aloofness of walking sure because she never worries about another

taking her place. I want what she has, because it is the opposite of me, when I

look in the mirror there is no pride in who I see. A brown girl living in a blind, vain

world, the rest stop for men when they get tired of meeting standards. Big Sis said I

need to raise my head, quit worrying about everyone else and cultivate my needs

instead, but I told Big sis that I know what I need, I need to look like her to put the

men on their knees. I need her assurance, her confidence, her face….I bet her

sex secrets are something that I need to bag up and study for the time of my chase.

Now Big Sis is hollering that I’m a disgrace. Ready to redress my soul for a man with

no face. Ready to sell my essence for the smile of a man who will never see my value

no matter what I package it in. Big sis has always been stubborn, stuck in her ways,

so it keeps her from hearing the value in what I say. I tell her why I’m willing to leave

the man that I love, for a man that admires a woman that I’m nowhere near a copy of.

It’s because she’s in the place where I wanted to be and I chose the man I’m with

now because the one I’m meant to love is too caught up in her to see. Big Sis..She

don’t even want to speak to me now, she said my loyalty and faithfulness are shattered.

My devotion to this man unfounded. Telling me I need to let Jesus in to help me get

grounded. I ignore her now. No sense in stopping my plan. When I get done fixing my

true love will finally be my man..The other woman vanquished. Defeated. She can find

some other prey. My man is in my web now. There is no arsenal I won’t pull out to make

him stay.