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over the last 31 days

Musings

1

The Arbor's Gate

The night had hung a full moon over the arbor's gate as the shadows migrate beneath trellises of wild roses  and I saw an angel in my dreams as granny sang me lullabies as her tears flowed over empty teacups and her cuddle-ups  the night grandpa didn't come home but an angel danced in soft shoes  in a plate of grits and red-eye gravy as night hung a full moon over the arbor's gate...Read On

5

Finding Life and Losing Faith

I can no longer view life the same way as before.

As we sat down sipping our tea from our teacup around the dining table, the sister superior welcomed and thanked us for volunteering to help them. The three of us were handed the guidelines, explaining to us the work we could help out with. I went through the list quickly, as the sister of the Missionary of Charity continued to explain to us the things we could help out with. After...Read On

3

The Two O'Clock

“Stay your hand, kind sir, I implore you! I am your 2:00 o’clock client.

Professor Bartholomew Hartfeld sat in a tall leather-backed chair behind a dark mahogany desk. He looked irritably at the clock on the wall opposite his desk. His 2:00 pm was late. He flicked the button on the intercom. “Has my two o’clock called to say he’d be late?” Professor Hartfeld asked. “No, sir,” Marta answered. “Please let me know the moment he arrives,” the professor requested,...Read On

1

Puppy Dog Tongue

At dusk twilight and the sun crowns over the horizon of yesterday's song. I will remember the days of September when granny served blackeye peas and cornbread. Prayers were said and my puppy dog slurped with a puppy dog tongue. Vic Damone gave granny the vapors and Jim Nabors was on TV. Constipation was in, the chits were out at the old ball game. Cracker Jacks had a prize. Grandpa worked...Read On

2

Times Have Changed

I remember when people ate fried chicken saying their amens while licking their hands and not fingers in a box puffed up with botox Granny had a new set of polished teeth from Sears and Robuck and I had a slinky two for one but her Harley had saddlebags   Now Jello has lost its wiggle, made in Japan by some Shogun in a lean cuisine    and taste like crayons Honey came from honey bear...Read On

5

Some Thoughts On Love

There is something peculiarly British about the fact that we have many different words for precipitation arising from our legendary obsession with the weather, itself not surprising for a people living on an island at the junction of four weather systems but with a prevailing westerly airstream. In contrast, the most dramatic and powerful of human emotions is summed up in a single rather...Read On

7

Know and believe

Some will make changes Pretend and control Harden their hearts Lose their souls Choices are there Trust and believe See the signs Listen to the silence You will hear Destiny was written Soul mates were made Walk the path your given Travel safely with my heart You must see dark For brightness to shine Sadness shows How happiness great is Change will alter Only so far You got...Read On

7

Hey Friend

I'm missing the good parts of a bad friend, and I fear they're gone for good ~cheese on bread

Hey, listen friend, I get it. I do understand where you are coming from, how you feel, and what you are trying to accomplish. I'm in the same place as you, it's dark and intimidating; lonely. You miss a friend you once had, maybe they weren't the best of friends, maybe they drive you up the wall but still you did care about them. You still care about them and even still you want to undo...Read On

8

Grief

Loss never heals Pain does not go away To become whole again Rebuild around Remember each day Love is never lost It is constant and true The raindrops tap a song The sun does shine Temperatures climb One will smile Things are never the same Nor should it be The heart cries tears That cannot be controlled  ...Read On

8

Don't Care, Grumpy Bear

I was watching, amused, as two girls had a tiff over one of the activity boards. One of the girls stood up and made to walk away. The other girl said something I couldn't make out. The girl who was standing turned around, put her hands on her hips and declared loud and proud, "Don't care, grumpy bear!" then she stormed off in dramatic four-year-old fashion. That's a great line. I'm using that...Read On

1

Memories

Growing up, we had fried chicken on Sunday. Now we have chicken nuggets without bones. Where do boneless chickens come from? A butcher gave my mom soup bones. Now they come in a package. Three for four dollars. Granny snapped green beans. Now they have no snap. Just in a can with a flap.     Succotash was corn and lima beans. Now it's an expletive from a damn cat. Jello came in powder to...Read On

6

More Doc Johnson-isms...

Why is it that when you order items to be delivered from your local lumber yard for a home project, the missing item is always the one you needed most to do the project. Does anyone else think that porch pirates work in conjunction with certain drivers of package delivery services? Why is it that when the instructions say “No Tools Required”, you always need tools? Do you ever wonder why...Read On

13

Lean on me

Ask.

Lean on me Ask your heart's desire A broken limb Never heals perfectly And hurts in the cold Silent tears of the heart Sadness so great Is not a weakness  But a love so great With support and love Whatever you need I got you Lean on me  ...Read On

9

Magic around you

When the wind blows A chill in the air Gentle rain falls Or a hard thunderstorm Stars that shine bright Or clouds hide the light Hot summers days  And cold winter nights The magic around With each sign will tell Your never alone I'll always be near  ...Read On

11

Pandemonium

That time, feeling lost with the pain ...

Panic starts to cripple my mind as the realization sinks into my consciousness. A merry song is softly playing somewhere from a piped in speaker, as if laughing at my expense. My feet carry me to a sacred place, looking for sanctuary. My eyes remain tightly shut as tears fall, both my hands clasped tightly together on bended knees in a corner. My heart and my soul are breaking,...Read On

4

I Ruminate on My Mediocrity

My mediocrity overwhelms me as I ruminate on my life. Were my expectations too high? Work, sleep, succeed, marry, parent, mentor, and prevail. Seven words in everyone’s life. If you know their meaning, you’re living your life backward. Fewer memories to make and more to forget ahead. The road in front of me is shorter than the one behind. I have more regrets than a thousand Frank Sinatras. ...Read On

4

Writing

A fiber of connection from miles away...

  Our places on this earth are divided by oceans setting us apart from one continent to another. Several countries speaking several languages to understand each other. People with several cultures and beliefs. Different personalities and opinions. In this chaotic world we live in called real life we search for a place to escape from that reality. To be accepted as who or what we are. We...Read On

9

Late night thoughts

Do you ever miss us?

Hey, it's been quiet, and the time since I messaged last, I don't quite remember if it's been half a year or a year and a half. It's been a long time in perspective but in hindsight, it isn't as long as it feels. Not to ramble too long, how have you been? I ask that blatantly no matter what, I know. Sometimes I don't care to know and other times I do want to know you're okay and alive and...Read On

2

Investigations of a Kafkaesque Nature

A walk in the park is not necessarily a walk in the park if you know what I mean.

I’m running through a lush field of yellow grass blades after a black cat under a blue sky. The cat jinks this way and that but I’m gaining on him. I’ve never run so fast in my life. It’s like I’m flying over the grasses and through the bushes. It’s like I’m synchronized with all motion and I’m lying still inside the motion while the universe is doing the running and the cat and I are one...Read On

6

Rain

For someone I used to love.

Sprinkling softly, the rain falls down to earth, like tears from the heavens. Ironic in this moment, as my own eyes start to well. I close my eyes and bite my lip, pushing back my feelings as a clap of thunder shakes the ground. My once-treasured thunderstorms are leaving me empty, broken. Thanks to you. Bittersweet I suppose, I always knew deep down I was never good enough. Oh so painfully...Read On

2

Seesaws

I remember when kites had tails, falling leaves and Brussel sprouts. Seesaws sawed and acorns had caps. I remember when pies were round and not "pie are square." "Where have all the popsicle sticks gone, so long ago?"  I remember double features and Dinah Shore. Howdy Doody was controlled by strings, and Gene Autry sang. It was the age of black and white TV with rabbit ears. I remembered...Read On

11

Boy Germs, and other stories.

"Heeeeeey teacher," a child said to me, just as I was about to sit down and effectively ruin the fun of the children who were painting without fully being supervised. "My name is Laura, not teacher," I said. Oh, the joys of working at a new school. "Laula," the child said. Close enough.  "How can I help?" I asked little Miss Four, standing in front of me. She was looking very bright...Read On

9

Aww

Watching In the shadow of darkness As candlelight dance So very close Heated air on skin Making nerve endings come alive Waiting  In aww of excitement Feeling  As hearts join as one Knowing Time stands still Now and Forever              ...Read On

8

Bookstore

You're laughing at me ...

I know, I can feel it. I can almost hear your laughter as I slowly walk in the stationary section of my favorite bookstore this morning. The new arrival display of journals and notebooks, along with the colored pens. Itching my way to start browsing the section, touching the hardbound cover of the journal and feel every texture of every page. I thought to buy two sets, I choose the red for...Read On

10

The Butterfly

When I was twenty years old my grandfather was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He passed before I turned twenty-one. In all my years leading up to that day no one ever sat me down and taught me how to deal with the pain of loss. There were no classes in school. My mom never explained how it would feel, or how to cope with that pit in your stomach. It was just one of those things I had...Read On

11

The Scar I chose

An extremely personal tale of my scars.

Life has a funny way of knocking us all down, making it seem impossible to get back up. Luckily, the human spirit is stronger than disaster, able to withstand things we thought we weren’t capable of. For some of us, life marks its territory in our lives through physical scars. All with names. Dates. Places. Stories. A constant reminder of what’s happened to us through old, puckered skin. ...Read On

8

Darkness' Song

 

5

The Board is Changing

The Board is changing. The Board will change is perhaps a better way to say it. When the Board changes, the game changes. And when the game changes, no one predicts the outcome because there are new rules in the game. No one can predict the game's winners or losers when the rules are not yet known and discovering the new rules is part of the game. The watchers are hopeful the game will...Read On

12

How Deep Is Lonely

Do ghosts feel lonely? Everybody knows by now that all of the Toys R Us outlets have been closed. The Toys R Us in Sunnyvale, CA was and still is haunted. The occurrences in this outlet have been well documented and even had a live TV ghost hunt for the nation to watch. Amazingly, the cameras actually filmed a shadow of a man leaning against the shelves watching the ghost hunters do...Read On

10

Wishes

Warmth Yearning Growing stronger Deep breaths Heart racing  Hands begin to sweat Mind alert Body tingles Can't think  Words mixed up Feeling teenage goofy Head over heels in love            ...Read On