About BobDobalina

Biography

"The details of my life are quite inconsequential. Where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it." ~Dr. E.

Name:
Robert Dobalina
Sex:
Male 
Age:
45
Sign:
Aquarius
Relationship Status:
Single
Location:
Kerplakistan, Kyrgyzstan
Local Time:
30 May 2020 20:37
Interests:
Ice Hockey, Fermented beverages, Cunnilingus,
Favorite Books:
The God Delusion, Lightning, 48 Laws of Power, Heart of Darkness, I AM Legend, Das Kapital
Favorite Movies:
Cool Hand Luke, Jackie Brown, Inglorious Basterds, Angel-A, Goodfellas, Shawshank Redemption, The Royal Tenenbaums, The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou, Fight Club, Back to the Future I & II, Forrest Gump, Half-Baked, Blue Streak, Silver Streak, Young Frankenstein, Das Boot, Good Will Hunting, Snatch, Lock Stock & Two Smoking Barrels, The Big Lebowski, V for Vendetta, Trainspotting, Harry Potter & the Half-Blood Prince
Favourite TV Shows:
Fringe, Big Bang Theory, Black Mirror, Twilight Zone, Alfred Hitchcock Presents, Llamas with Hats, Key & Peele, Drunk History
Favorite Music:
Living Colour, Jamiroqua, Spoon,Soul Coughing, Mike Doughty, Alice in Chains, Green Day, RHCP, Jurassic 5, Bloodhound Gang, Pink Floyd, Yazoo, Great Big Sea, Corey Stevens, Robert Cray, Pepper, Van Halen, David Bowie, Rolling Stones, Megadeth, Jane's Addiction, Chris Isaak, David Lanz, Social Distortion, Wynton Marsalis, Morphine, Mark Sandman, Grandpa's Cough Medicine, Bach, Boccherini, Mozart, Corelli, The Two Man Gentlemen Band, Me First and the Gimme Gimmes, Reel Big Fish, The Mighty Bosstones, Jim Croce, RATM, Paul Simon, Wyclef
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Statistics

Date Joined:
25 Oct 2016
Last Visit:
15 Feb 2017 (1200 days ago)
Page Viewed:
1,101 times
Friends:
2
Followers:
1
Days in Chat:
0
Days on Site:
0
Forum Posts:
0
Stories:
11
Badges:
1

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Feel

Feelings come and feelings go Like a gentle breeze Or a Winter’s snow   Precipitously occurring  With a modicum of incubus  And ne’er a warning   Should thou embrace them? Push them away? Erase them?   Multiplicity can be confounding Make a man feel defenseless As though he were drowning   Like the gentle drops of a morning rain Is it safe to feel Devoid the mitigation of pain?  ...

Added 14 Feb 2017 | Category Poetry | Votes 1 | Avg Score 5 | Views 536 | 1 Comment

Donald Trump and Election Night

Donald Trump and Election Night Remember, remember the eighth of November,  The day America, in the foot, we shot.  ‘Tis the season For moving to Schweiz in A 747 if you’re distraught. _____________________________________ Donald Trump, Don, what’s his aim To be elected President using a confidence game. Be careful what you wish, you deplorable lot For you have just elected an...

Added 14 Nov 2016 | Category Poetry | Votes 2 | Avg Score 5 | Views 325 | 2 Comments

The 7even Stages of Relationship Separation (Male Perspective)

The 7even Stages of Relationship Separation (Male Perspective) Stage One: HELL YEA I’m free, and nobody can take that from me. We weren’t meant to be encumbered by another person constantly sucking our will to live. I can eat what I want, do what I want, do who I want, leave the toilet seat up*, leave my clothes on the floor, drink from the [insert beverage name here] carton, and...

Added 08 Nov 2016 | Category Musings | Votes 2 | Avg Score 5 | Views 483 | 2 Comments

Truth

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot This describes everything you are...

Added 30 Oct 2016 | Category Poetry | Votes 2 | Avg Score 3.5 | Views 507 | 1 Comment

What's the Use

I am not sad to say But I cannot do this another day This filthy job is not for me Please find it in your heart to agree Put me down and walk away I can no longer fight this decay If I had a nose the smell would make me gag If I had arms, I would wave a white flag This job tends to depress I wish you would see your DDS Oh what’s the use I cannot fight My only job is to make you white...

Added 29 Oct 2016 | Category Poetry | Votes 2 | Avg Score 5 | Views 423 | 2 Comments

Ideal World

In an ideal world, Utopia is the capital and Thomas More the king People would be happy and not want for a thing There would be no wars, pestilence, or disease There would be no homeless on the streets to freeze Babies would smile and never cry Your parents would grow old but never die The bright yellow sun would shine every day Pushing the dark stormy clouds far away There would be...

Added 28 Oct 2016 | Category Poetry | Votes 1 | Avg Score 5 | Views 386 | 2 Comments

DepressMode

In the darkest depths it’s found In each corner of the round Its nature is to make you doubt What it is you’re all about Escape it once you’ll barely glean The likes of this infernal machine Up to bat once again You feel its claws digging in Try to shake it a little bit It never knows just when to quit Sure it’s easy to just check-out This is certain, without a doubt Fight the...

Added 27 Oct 2016 | Category Poetry | Votes 2 | Avg Score 5 | Views 509 | 3 Comments

Here Comes the...

Peeking From Darkness That Brilliant Ball of Fire Smiles Brightening Our Day ...

Added 26 Oct 2016 | Category Poetry | Votes 2 | Avg Score 5 | Views 495 | 2 Comments

Love is

Love is comfort Love is kind Love is a gentle smack on the behind Love can be mean Love can be cruel Love can make you crazy and act a fool Love is holding your child tight Love is the feeling that everything is all right Love is the 2000 Lb. elephant that stands on your chest Love is seldom fair and often leads to your arrest...

Added 31 Oct 2016 | Category Poetry | Votes 4 | Avg Score 4.5 | Views 489 | 2 Comments

Best Man Speech 02/21/2004

Best Man’s Toast 2/21/04 Marriage Is… Good times, Bad times…..Ups and Downs Smiles, Laughter, Frustration, and Frowns Marriage Is… Having someone to lean on when you’ve had a bad day Having someone to make you feel special in every way Marriage Is… Saying, “I’m Sorry” even when you’re not wrong It’s being there for each other and being strong Marriage takes patience,...

Added 01 Nov 2016 | Category Poetry | Votes 2 | Avg Score 4 | Views 598 | 1 Comment

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Friends Comments

storiesspace
Happy Birthday from the team at Stories Space.
03 Feb 2020 00:20
storiesspace
Happy Birthday from the team at Stories Space.
03 Feb 2019 00:30
storiesspace
Happy Birthday from the team at Stories Space.
03 Feb 2018 00:30
storiesspace
Happy Birthday from the team at Stories Space.
03 Feb 2017 00:30
adi_me
Welcome
25 Oct 2016 06:04
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