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Dirk's Family - An Introduction

Dirk's Family - An Introduction

An introduction to Dirk's Team and Family - The Dirty Dozen

This is fiction, any resemblance to real people or incidents is purely incidental.

Dirk was in his bunk listening to his dark country mix when Devin came in and smacked his boot hanging off the bed and said, "The boss wants you."

He took out his earbuds and sprang out of the bunk and dropped to the floor and pumped out 50 pushups, stood up and then slapped Devin in the shoulder. "Any idea why the boss wants me?"

"No, I'm just the messenger dude. He looks bored as usual and I heard from Kat that we got nothing in the hopper," replied Devin.

Dirk left the residence floor and headed to the office.  He could understand the boss' boredom and felt the same way.  They were only back a couple days and the downtime pace was already getting to him.

As Dirk entered the reception Nat looked over at him from her computer, "Hi Dirk."

"Hi Nat, that's a new look for you, what happened to your hair?"

"Kat bleached it for me.  Don't you like it?"

"It drew my eyes right to your ponytail, is Kat going to finish the rest or am I going to have to start calling you Skunk Girl?"

"Why do you have to be so mean?  I like it.  Stripes and streaks are the thing right now.  You used to be nice, now you are just an asshole like the other snake eaters. The boss is expecting you - I hope he chews your ass."

"Any idea what this is about?" replied Dirk with nonchalance.

"I don't know and I don't care but when you come back out I expect an apology," Nat said with a pout on her lips.

Dirk opened the door into the inner office and approached the boss' desk. "Hey boss, you got a mission for us?"

The boss looked up at Dirk from the papers on his desk, "No, not an official mission, but I want to send you out for some personal time."

"Personal time? I'm good boss, can't think of anywhere I even want to go."

"Why don't you take a seat, Dirk," after a pause the boss continued, "the right answer would have been a non-hesitating "yes boss" answer."

"I did not know it was an order," replied Dirk. "No disrespect boss, but this is my family now and I would rather be with the team."

"Maybe the team needs a break from you Dirk. You ever thought about that?"

"No, I have to admit I never thought about that. Someone complaining on me or something?"

"Dr Ingram."

"Who's Dr Ingram? asked Dirk with a puzzled face.

"Dr Ingram is the post-mission shrink you met with when we got back Friday. This is her evaluation on my desk."

"That cold bitch?  I answered the questions the same way I always do after a mission. Why would my eval be any different this time?"

"Why you calling her a cold bitch? She's just doing her job, Dirk."

"Because she is not part of the team and has no fucking clue what it is like out in the field. She's got no place judging me or any of us."

The boss did not take his gaze away from Dirk and just let some time go by. An uncomfortably long time.

Finally, Dirk broke the silence with, "Sorry boss."

The boss let some more time go by but stopped looking at Dirk and picked up one of the papers from his desk and reviewed it. He finally put it back down and resumed his penetrating look back at Dirk.

"Dr Ingram is my ex-wife. I'm guessing you did not know that."

"No Sir, I did not know that."

The boss let more time go by, again not taking his eyes from Dirk.

"What did I say when you first joined this team about calling me Sir?"

"Oh - sorry boss, I forgot."

"You forgot what I told you or you forgot not to do it?

"I forgot not to do it, I remember what you said."

"This is my point, Dirk, you usually have a clear head and don't fuck up, but you just fucked up pretty big time with that one. Remind me, Dirk, what did I say would happen if you ever called me Sir?"

"You said you would toss my ass off your team."

"That's right Dirk, that's what I said. I didn't say I would kick your ass or attempt to kick your ass, I simply said you would be off the team.  Has anyone else still on the team ever called me Sir, Dirk?"

"No boss, at least I have never heard it. Those that have are gone."

"So, if I don't follow through with my word, then I lose all cred, would you agree with that Dirk?"

"I fucked up boss."

"You do know what fuck up I'm talking about here, right Dirk?"

"Yes, boss, for calling you Sir boss."

"That's right Dirk. Not the fuck up where you called my ex-wife a cold bitch. That's not the fuck up we're talking about, we're talking about the one that puts me on the spot to kick my best operative off the team."

"I don't want to leave the team boss, it's my family, it's all I got. I fucked up boss. I'm really sorry."

"I'm sorry too Dirk. I'm sorry I made that comment to the team. I did it to try to instil discipline and to try to equalize my position on the team.  All it did was have everyone change "sir" to "boss", it accomplished the discipline for me, but it didn't equalize shit. It also endangered my cred if I ever had someone fuck up and challenge what I said and what I would have to do about it."

"Yes boss, I'm sorry boss."

"Another thing it did Dirk, is make you sound like a desperate sniveling apologist.  What is this doing to your cred, Dirk?  You sound weak and like a bitch yourself."

Both men were silent.  More time went by, finally, at a maximum state of feeling uncomfortable, the boss broke the silence: "So who's fuck up started this Dirk?"

More silence, followed with a very uncomfortable response by Dirk, "Yours boss."

"That's right Dirk, this was my major fuck up and I majorly regret it." Another very long pause. "You know what Dirk, I am going to give you and the rest of the team a moment of growth from my major fuck up. I am going to take this fuck up and make it something else. I am going to make it something I am more proud of."

With that, the boss got up from his chair and went to the door of his office and swung open the door.

"Nat," the boss said calmly, "I need you to gather the team, I want everyone here in the office as fast as you can get them here.  I mean now."

"Yes boss,"  Nat said jumping from her chair and sprinting out of the room.

With that, the boss looked back into the inner office at Dirk to see if he was watching. Dirk was not only watching, but he had also followed the boss to the door and was standing there watching the boss.

"Dirk, you see that?  Nat took off out of here like a track star. I'm guessing she heard part of our conversation, probably our voices a little loud about major fuck ups."

"Yes boss, this is probably not the best time to admit this but I am going to anyway. Nat told me she hoped you would chew my ass when I came in here."

"Nat? Why would she say that, did you make fun of her hair?"

"Yes boss, I told her that I would start calling her Skunk Girl."

The boss just looked at Dirk incredulously and let more time drag by uncomfortably. "You are just full of fuck ups today Dirk, major fuck ups.  Nat is such a sweet girl and colleague, you know she would never complain to me about that or anything you might say to her.  She likes you, Dirk, she likes everyone on this team."

"Yes boss, I fucked up, I am going to apologize to her, first chance I get. I was wrong boss. Majorly wrong."

"Yes you were Dirk, yes you were. Let's step back into my office until the team gets here. Might as well sit down again."

"I'd rather stand boss. When the team gets here, I want to be standing. This is my fuck up and I want to face the team acknowledging my fuck up. I don't want to feel more like a bitch boss."

"That's fine Dirk, by all means, stand up if you want. I am going to sit down. And I like that you are not going to act like a bitch in front of the team."

The boss sat back at his desk and took a bottle and glass out of his desk drawer and filled the shot glass. He then took the shot and put the bottle and glass back into the drawer and leaned back in his chair looking through his open door looking into the outer office where Nat's desk was.

Dirk could hear the noise from the hallway before he saw any of the team enter the office. First through the door was Jenn followed by Devin. Then Lilith, Rob, Jake, Leroy, Quinn, Kat, and Luna followed closely with Nat. All were breathing heavy and showed evidence of running to the office.

As Nat entered the office, she reported: "This is everyone boss, I got them here as fast as I could."

With that news, the boss got back out of his chair and walked into the outer office, standing next to Dirk facing the team.

"Thank you, Nat.  I am sure you are all wondering why I sent Nat for you to get here as fast as you could get here. I am not going to apologize for that. It's a very serious matter. I am not going to waste time with small talk and am going to get right to the point. I have made a major mistake. I have put myself in a tough spot. I have put myself in a position of weakness. I am going to pause about that and I have a question for each one of you. I am going to start with Nat. Nat, Dirk has majorly fucked up and has endangered his position with this team. If I could exercise an act of mercy and let him stay, would you support that?"

Without hesitating Nat responded boldly, "Yes boss, I support that!"

"Now Nat, Dirk has confided in me that he owes you an apology. I am going to let him apologize now, as he may not have the chance to after this." The boss then turned to Dirk.

"I am sorry Nat, I was an asshole and I ask for your forgiveness for what I said to you."

"It was nothing Dirk, I am now more embarrassed that I even asked for the apology. I hope this is not what caused this."

The boss' face broke out into a smile at that and responded, "No Nat, this has nothing to do with Dirk being a dick and calling you Skunk girl, his fuck up is far more serious than that. Rather than asking you each individually the same question I asked Nat, I am going to ask this a different way. Is there anyone here that would not want me to exercise an act of mercy for Dirk, and not hold him to my word which would require him to leave the team? Devin?"

"No boss, I would like Dirk to stay on the team."


"I would like Dirk to stay on the team boss."


"He should stay boss."


"He saved my life boss, he should stay boss."


"I would like him to stay boss."


"He needs to stay boss.  We would not be the same without him."


"If Dirk has to go, I ask to go with him boss."


"Saved my life too boss, he needs to stay."


"I'm for mercy boss."

"I appreciate each of your opinions. Unfortunately, that is all they are. Opinions. This is not your decision, although I empowered each of you to share your opinion in front of each other. You each had a choice to vote against mercy for Dirk. You all made the same recommendation. This is not surprising to any of us, I am sure. Of course, we don't want to lose Dirk from the team. Each one of us is integral to our success and even survival in the field. Each one of you. This is not just about Dirk, this is about our team. So back to my major mistake. I made a mistake in requiring each of you to not call me Sir. To have the threat that if you called me Sir, you would be off the team. Each of you has disciplined yourselves to not call me Sir. As you know, others have not been able to discipline themselves to that requirement and have indeed been removed from the team. Dirk has not called me Sir, until today. That is what this is all about. My integrity. My word. My mistake and as Dirk and I have acknowledged, my major fuck up. So the mercy I am actually asking of you today, is for you to show that mercy to me. To forgive me of this fuck up. To not lose your respect for me. To support me in my changing this requirement from not calling me Sir. I would like to remove that requirement completely. I want to remove the threat of you being removed from this team for calling me that or anything else. My intention now is from this time forward to not have that as a consequence. You can call me Sir, Boss, or whatever is appropriate to communicate thoroughly and in a respectful manner. If you call me Skunk Girl, there will be consequences, but not mandatory removal from the team, it will be some kind of punishment that I consult with Nat about, so it will be appropriate. Can you still respect me with this change?"

With that, every member of the team responded with a "Yes boss" except for Luna who shouted out a "Yes Sir!"  

The boss looked hard at Luna and then smiled and said, "Luna, I am not supposed to show that I have favorites, but well said, well said."

The boss then turned to Dirk. "Dirk lets keep our fuck ups to a minimum.  And to the rest of you, that's all for now, thanks for the fast react for this fuck up reconciliation. Oh wait, I got another thing. Dr Ingram gave me her report from our last mission on each one of your psychological assessments. Dirk was the first that I had in for a mandatory counseling session, so the rest of you will need to get with Nat to get on my schedule. Oh - and one last thing from Dr Ingram, she named our file: "The Dirty Dozen" - she can really be a cold bitch - but I like it - it's a good name for us.   Now you all get out of here, I need some time alone to rethink my life and try to forgive myself." He then walked back into his office and closed the door.

Dirk led the team out the doors of the outer office and as he passed Luna, he rubbed the top of her head and repeated "Yes Sir!" which resulted in Luna quipping "My new name for you Dirk is Fuck Up."


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