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How Do I Save You?

Tags: save, truth, fear,

In the voice of Philena, one of my characters.

I don’t know how all this started- he saw my bruises, he heard my words, he helped me, he questioned me, and he somehow got me to tell him, but I shouldn’t have. I should have just told him “it’s nothing” and left and never turned back, but I was so tired and he got to me.

He doesn’t even know the depth of the hurt and pain, I won’t tell him and he will never know. But what if he wants to know one of the days where I can’t help but tell him, and he asks? How can I keep it from him on those days? I’m so weak…

And if I tell him everything that I’ve been hiding all this time, he’s going to be mad- no he’ll be pissed. That I didn’t tell him or at me? I don’t know. I won’t know until I tell him, and I’m not going to tell him so I’ll never know.

One month later

I lay in bed, curled up in his arms- as far as he knows I’m asleep, and maybe I am if only a little. Maybe I’m half-asleep- like that in-between world of waking-dreams and fogginess. And in that foggy state I see His face- as he chuckles, as he hurts me, when I was younger- only ten years old. It’s like my mind hates me and wants me to see all of his faces from my period of existence around him- it wants to torture me, and it succeeds.

I’m woken up by him shaking me gently and asking if I’m alright. “You were crying,” he says softly, then he asks what it was- and in my sleepy state I tell him what I’ve been thinking about for the past weeks.

“Adam… I have stuff to tell you- stuff I didn’t before- but I don’t know if I can tell you…” I whisper, feeling my voice crack and the tears rolling slowly down my face.

“Why not? You can tell me anything, Philena, no matter what.” He caresses my cheek, thumbs wiping the tears away.

“Because I don’t know how I can save you if I do.” How do I save you… from the truth?
This story is protected by International Copyright Law, by the author, all rights reserved. If found posted anywhere other than with this note attached, it has been posted without my permission.

Copyright © Copyright 2012-2019 by Aria Leitner aka Colors_of_the_Wind

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