"Let me out. Let me out. Let me out." -Video of Alyssa Lies by Jason Michael Carroll.

***

"Hello?"

I jump at the voice behind me, and try to smile, but it's a grimace and he knows it.

"How are you, Philena? I haven't seen you in school for a week."

Adam is too curious for his own good. Someday he'll learn to leave some secrets... just be.

"Oh, I'm fine. Taking a little bit for myself... mental health days and such. I should be back tomorrow, actually."

His smile is enough to kill me. Too bad I'm too far gone for it to do much good.

"Would you like some coffee? I know this wonderful place just around the corner-"

"No... no, I should be getting home anyway." Not that I really want to.

"Are you sure there isn't anything I can offer just to see you for... half an hour?"

Persistent little thing. Innocent too. Too innocent to deal with me, but...

"Give me some distraction, or a beautiful release..." Memories seep from my soul. "...Let me be empty and weightless and maybe I'll find some peace tonight." (From Angel by Sarah McLachlan)

"That's from a song."

"I know."

He gives me a weird look. He recognizes the song. Good.

"So... coffee?"

I fake a smile and force a laugh.

"Sure."

He smiles. He bought it. Easy.

***

The pill bottle's full. The door is locked. Good.

The alcohol is soothing. They go down smooth. Great.

I fall asleep. I don't wake up. Perfect.

***

"Goodbye, Philena. I'm sorry"

I'm not.