Woke in the middle of the night recalling once I tried to count the stars that wheel over head, and recall that I have heard a lot of laughter from him and them, and others as well as have seen and experienced a lot of pain. Seems I have been hanging on to both memories and time as I tried to run as fast as I could in the darkest hours. Trying to hold onto things but, they still slip away, here in this concrete jungle and finding there are times I still ask why. When I see that strange arrival from a thousand miles away as the shadows start to fall, and seeing those obstacles and dangers I weave around, as it seems like the hammer is about fall.

Standing here with my reasons for it all, as I feel the shadows beginning to fall on me and still I have much more to say, and open up my fist to take all those things I have missed. Knowing that some things have become ingrained second nature and other things we teach ourselves to forget. As I stop here where I stand and wonder if I should believe those lines on my hands as those finest silver threads slowly unwind. I can’t be sad about all that has passed under those bridges that were blown and just to keep on moving down the line.

History at times is like gravity and at times hard to explain, with there being times I seem to haven’t known peace for so long it’s hard to remember at times. And then there’s those times when it seems I am likened to that lone soldier on the cross who lost every battle but ended up winning the war. Now heading down the tracks and passing a boxcar on the siding with flames licking the sides, and smoke pouring out its open door. And still there are times when I get asked if I know where I am going to, and what am I hoping for. And those are the times I ask those I pass not to get up as I am only passing through and tip my hat as I continue on down the line.

And one truth I have found has been that you always seem to hurt the one you love and should never hurt at all, and then cover it all up with lies. With corrupt ways always seeming to make one blind, with there being times making me feel like I am sitting in a cell staring at the walls. And this is MY life, and for living it I know I will pay. But, I ain’t going to think of those things, and instead try to be free or I won’t have nothing at all. Winter’s almost done and the summer is coming on, and making me feel like I should be travelin’ on to where the soft winds blow.

In the turning of twilight under those sapphire tinted skies, as those stars slowly turn from cherry red to blue, and deep in the shadows of moonlight I know that I should just keep on keepin’ on down the line, or where these back roads and railroad tracks will lead. After having marched out the door years ago and walked to the tolling of the bell and fought with the devil in all of the details, as I saw those appear and then disappear like smoke, just like Tao said as the moment passed by.

Not belonging to anyone or anything, and some seem to think that’s a shame, as I look at those scars I carry like souvenirs. And I have always known that life is more than who we are and try to be, with the past always being close behind. And every day and hour taking the pain, tears and lies and converting them into power after having been fighting to be an individual most of my life, becoming stronger in the process. Having played cards against the Devil and never folded my hand and tried to bluff my way through to win, even though I was dealt a losing hand. And still I rise up with all the strength I have found and know there is nothing I can’t do.

Copyright Timberwolf International LTD: March 2016 – 11