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Fighting the addiction

I wish someone could understand 
The burn, the urge, the pain, 
The feeling of being trapped in sand 
Or being caught in the ice cold rain

Like its out of your control
When in fact it controls you 
You can try to set a goal
But it is the best you can do

Sometimes every day is a fight
And you try not to surrender 
Other times you feel normal and right 
And life isn't so tender

I wish you could walk in my shoes 
For even just an hour 
To feel the torment and blues 
Of feeling like you have no power

It sounds cool and fun to have such a great need
But it is nothing of the sort 
when you think of control, you have none
All ideas of reality distort

If you could just make the feeling go away 
And put your feet back on solid ground 
The restraint might stay 
No matter who is around

In a quick flash, the desires return
If you could only, touch 
Perhaps diminish the burn 
Maybe you wouldn't hurt so much

In and out of control each day, trying to withstand 
Wavering between preservation and need
Wondering how anyone could understand
how much it makes your heart bleed

Grasping at restraint
The passion is raw and on fire 
Feeling lost and faint 
Trying to choke down the desire

But the person is an unknown
All that matters is the emptiness you feel
That nothing will fill
Because what you want isn't real

But what if it was 
If you were lucky enough to find The One
If you let your guard down and let him inside 
Would you still want to run?

Or would you finally feel 
As if you have found your home
Your soul at peace 
With no desire to roam

What if one person filled your heart to the brim
Made you let go of all the pain 
And made your need burn only for him? 
Would you ever be the same?

Would you ever want to be?
Or would you heal and feel suddenly free
To never again feel like something is missing 
But instead like you are where you were always meant to be

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