Sounds in my mind

Real or just pathology

My family tries to be kind

Patience wears thin in summer heat

Bed is my refuge where I find peace

No need to talk, interact or eat

Sleep I slip into and refuse to wake

Episodes that repeat, I'm sick of now

I'll rise and pretend, for my family's sake

A tunnel with no end, just curves and cracks

Worth fighting for, my life, this time not sure how

Advice, suggestions, coddling, tough love

I've heard it all over the years, yet still

I linger between really living and feeling like dying

I'm tired this time, more than ever before

Let someone else take on the burden for me

I don't have the strength to fix others any more

Let alone tackle myself, just leave and let me be

My brain will slow and nonsense will subside

Not everything needs to be fixed and repaired

Trust that I can rest my mind and mend my ways

I'll return to the fold, scarred, dented but mostly whole