A hundred little monkeys are jumping on the bed,

One shouts Sexist, thumps another on the head.

A third little monkey who was jumping on the bed

Pointed out the inaccuracy of what the first one said.

A fourth little monkey said the third one was wrong.

The fifth little monkey cried, “Why can’t we get along?”

The sixth little monkey quoted Maya Angelou

And the seventh little monkey said, “I never knew.”

The eighth little monkey said the thumping of Number Two

Was justified by the Holy Writ of Timbuktu.

The ninth little monkey played his best wild card

Said no sex offenders could play in his yard.

The tenth little monkey looked on with disbelief

It was too much for him; he sought sexual relief.

He, or she, or some variation of the theme,

Quoted the Mighty Internet, shouted out a meme.

In the background was a monkey with a sad little face,

He jumped off the bed to start a new human race.

“These monkeys are impossible; I’m leaving this zoo,”

And found himself alone with nothing ever to do.

So he watched the other monkeys and their hullabaloo,

Documenting the foibles of the ones still in the zoo.

When his book was finished he had the Answers True,

So he thought really hard about what he ought to do.

Then he made a mighty leap back upon the bed,

And used his book to clobber the Sexist on the head,

The clobbered little monkey was pushed to the floor,

The eleventh monkey shouted, “Oh, my! Nevermore.”

Ninety-nine little monkeys are jumping on the bed,

One shouts Racist, thumps another on the head.

And now you know the story of the almost human race,

I’m jumping back on the bed, I see a little space.

I have my weapon with me, a ditty so divine,

A song-poem on "Forums" with a witty little rhyme.