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Somedays I feel like diving,

out to the ocean and into the cold,

just let the waves take me,

until I naturally float.


My most morbid thoughts,

are of getting old,

it's a long hard life,

and I don't want to be around that long.


All the time I try to feel indifferent,

but what will I become,

with no passion, no anger,

with nothing to love?


All that is left is this sad, degrading carcass.

And as for my soul,

it has rotten; it's gone dark,

my very own life is falling apart.


Now that there is so much to say,

what I can think of is being mute,

let everyone have their way,

I will just stay silent until the end of days.


I feel like drowning,

but then I remember,

it feels horrible,

it's like pain into your lungs,

it's like mixing vomit and smoke,

it's like a lifelong lovely sun.


I feel like drowning,

but every day,

I drown in sorrow,

I laugh in pain,

I sulk in regret,

I remember mistakes.


I am sure it wasn't all in vain,

There must be a reason,

Why everything is this way,

I must accept,

I must realize,

everything has a reason in life.


This story is protected by International Copyright Law, by the author, all rights reserved. If found posted anywhere other than with this note attached, it has been posted without my permission.

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