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Our Musings category focuses on speculation, reflection and deep thought, covering everything from self-contemplation to humorous views on life in general. This is the place to submit your thoughts on spiritual matters or philosophical subjects and to share your feelings on any topics you’ve ever pondered or wondered about.


Adventures with an autistic boy

I got told off at work the other day. Not uncommon, the children always have an answer for everything, and I am constantly getting attitude and sass, but I just sass them straight back. I am teaching the next generation to be sarcastic assholes. You're welcome, society. The particular boy who told me off, has no language skills. He is on the autistic spectrum and he has a specialist who...Read On


A Father's Reflection

Each and every moment is a gift that they share with me...

Today is my son's 10th birthday. I never thought I would make it, but now, my kids are my life. They keep me from stopping. My own father was murdered when I was five and those 'why' and 'what if' demons never leave. They also remind me of their presence at the most inopportune times. Each birthday that reaches my son, I hope that I have been, and still can be, the father to him that I...Read On


Take Me From Babylon

Standing out here out on a mesa in these high desert plains and hearing what sounds like voices on the wind that’s softly blowing, and I am stretching imagination and nerves to hear what they seem to be saying. Knowing that the path I have followed is right which the Tao has decided and directed those of us chosen to find that single Essential Truth that shines in our minds like a mission. As...Read On


More Ponderin's

Why is it… The kitchen trash always needs to be emptied the day before trash pick up… The manufacturer always recommends a maximum 60w bulb in a fixture, but you need 3 of them… That every battery required between AAA and D cell are 1.5 volts… That when I was a kid we never had expiration dates on foods and we survived… That people decide to use a card to pay for everything, yet look at...Read On


The Grand Opening

If you read the newspaper regularly, you probably missed the news about the grand opening, for the simple fact, it wasn't reported by the media or tabloids. I am, of course, talking about the grand opening of my nail salon last week at the daycare.  It had all started the week prior when one of the boys asked why my nails were purple. I had painted them that colour so they matched my dress...Read On


For What It’s Worth

Standing here and knowing that we are all flawed and at times seem to be stuck with the things we aren’t proud of, along with the decisions that we have made that turn into those thoughts that torture our dreams and seem to cripple our souls. There times when I, or rather we hate being out here and it seems to be like a nightmare, and sometimes asking ourselves if God is out there and...Read On



Strength for the day Hope for tomorrow Happiness and faith For calm and peace To not be afraid To find a way to understand The thoughts in my head Growing each day With compassion and pride To accept what I must Following my heart The power within Feeling The power grows  Deep within    ...Read On


Friday The 13th

Yesterday was Thursday the 12th

Friday the 13th?! Other than a series of semi-scary movies (one through five actually terrified me once upon a time) today is just another day. Right? I don’t understand all the hokey “bad luck day” nonsense. I’d ask Google if my internet worked. It went out this morning. As did my cell service. Luckily I had nothing better to do today than sleep.  Okay. That isn’t entirely true. I did have...Read On


The predestined affinity

I believe the life is kept coming back. I also believe the people we meet this time, this life.

  Long, long time ago, a young scholar arranged to marry his lovely betrothed. Everything was well prepared on schedule. When the day came, the bride to be-she got married to someone else. He was fallen apart at the seams and very sick. His parents tried so hard to raise his spirit up. Watching their only son nearly at his last gasp, they felt so impotent.   By that time, a monk learned...Read On


North Delta

Remembering a time walking all alone in the Southern rain, and passing by both graveyards and battlefields along with the forests and the fields that stand here under both the moon and the sun’s dark light. Knowing that at one time both the Valkyrie and the Angels came to gather to carry off those who left their blood stained on those battlefields, past the moon to live forever in either...Read On

One Life

One life hangs in the balance as everyone was too busy. Too busy to listen, to read between the lines. Intersecting lives, but a little too late. Suicide is the only answer for some.   One minute here and then gone the next, for eternity. What do you know about suicide? Has it happened to someone you know? Did you ignore them as they suffered in silence?   Everyone is so busy;...Read On


Fashion 101

Working with children, you're privy to some of their conversations. Overheard snippets as you walk past or sit next to them. Even the very young children somehow seem to be able to effectively communicate with each other. To me, it just sounds like random noises and baby babble, but they just know.  On Wednesday I was partially privy to such a conversation when I walked down the other end...Read On


Tell Tale Signs

Every step of the way we walk the line and in most cases, we get what we deserve, as your days are numbered and so are mine. While time seems to be piling up as we seem to struggle and scrape with there being no place to escape to as we all feel like we are boxed in. With just more games to be played by them with their jukebox tears, and they seem to be lookin’ out at the cotton fields for...Read On

Yo Stupid

Just a rant



Sunrise, Sunset

Swiftly flow the days

The first sunrise I lived through was in Arkansas. I was born in a small clinic in a small town called Mulberrry. My mother didn't live there. My parents had a rental house in another small town named Alma. But she was lucky enough to give birth to me in a modern facility rather than at home. Not long after that we started our movement around the country. My father's parents had followed...Read On

To Know

To know that for me to remember and to fully commit, I must be that age and feel everything as it was. It feels like a death sentence to me. Certain thoughts or pictures scared me fully.   I just don't think I can ever relive the things that I can recall. I know that sex in some form had hurt me when I was younger. I shudder and look out the window. It's peaceful and quiet.   ...Read On


A Better Man

I am sorry. There is little more that I can say. I was not the man you thought I was. In a better world, I would have loved you from afar, crying as I saw you pair up with another but seeing you happy. I have always known that I was different and not in a good way. You deserved someone who could support you and hold your trust. I, clearly, am not that man. Sooner or later, I drive everyone...Read On


In A Lifetime

A view of the current political landscape

Shadows are falling, and I have been standing here all day, with time seeming to be running away and there is no reason to really be anywhere. It feels like my sense of humanity is slowly going down the drain, and hope seems and feels like it is slowly becoming undone. While I feel like my humanity has gone down the drain. I ain’t really looking for anything in anyone’s eyes, and though it’s...Read On


Seagulls Don't Give A...

Are we sure human beings are the smart ones?

As long as no one tried to shoot or eat me, I'd like to be a bird. A seagull, to be exact. Flying around, crapping on cars, telling people to flock off. Maybe even make a few little ones. It's a perfect life. They are also completely disconnected. Some days, I also wonder what being disconnected would be like - no phone, no television or radio or internet, and definitely, no...Read On


Every time I swallow my drink too fast, usually water, I am reminded of my near drowning. I hate thinking about it, for I don't wish to remember that time period or anything else associated with that. I fear it may drive me to madness.   I'd feel completely suffocated, unable to unentangle myself and take my emotional health to safety. I don't have any tools yet for when I cross that path.  ...Read On


The story of a blind and a lantern

The earth is getting very sick day by day. But, the human minds are thousand times sicker !.......

  An ascetic came from a long journey to an obscure village on a gloomy night.   There were some villagers continuously walking to and fro in the streets. When the ascetic walked into an alley, he saw a dim yellow light approaching quietly from the deep end of the alleyway. A villager said, ‘The blind is coming!’ THE BLIND! The ascetic wondered. He asked someone nearby, ‘Is...Read On


Another Unedited Musing

It's unedited. Enjoy it, or whatever.

I’m not entirely sure I like you. Everything here is too bright and too dark.  It’s a fucking paradox and it doesn’t make any sense. It doesn’t even make paradoxical sense. Like, why am I sitting here typing this?  My hands are betraying me. The wind is harsh, yet comforting. Why’m I even drunk? Am I sober?  Do I exist? Ugh, questions! Like, I could just write this out like some...Read On

Recommended Read

Waiting for Irma

Nothing else to do

I'm sitting here in Southwest Florida, mere feet from the Gulf of Mexico. I live here. I've lived here for 30 years and have never been this scared. There is a storm coming. A huge storm. Hurricane Irma. She is 400 miles of catastrophic wind and will bring storm surges over 12 feet high. I feel like I am waiting to die. We all are. My family. My love. My life. Waiting.  Why don't I head...Read On


Blue Lamp

Every second is a life time with every minute bringing you closer to God, with nothing seen but red lights which make your body seem to burn. With a minute in the sunshine seems to translate sometimes as a decade in the dark a world away as it takes part in a dream. Still, there are times when it all remains like those finest simple threads when you feel you can’t clear your head, and...Read On



S eeing the Devil sitting on the doorstep telling everyone how to live, and what about the place we call home? With there being so many times it seems we live out our lives as if we are in chains and in most cases, don’t realise that we have the keys to those chains, with the escape in most cases being sleep. Most think we can just go back and it just makes no sense with the enemy residing...Read On

I Know

I know why the night sings to me, And why the woods are my home. I know why the whip-or-will sings to only me, So I can dry my tears on my pillow more easily.   I know why I can't sleep anymore, But it took a lifetime until now to understand. My light stays on when I sleep, For I cannot fathom the darkness.   Angels watch over me, keeping me safe from harm. I needn't look over...Read On



Dragons Dragons flying in and out of clouds. I am the son of man.  Fearful of the unknown. Winds blowing breaking trees.  Fingers of fire light up the dark.  Roar of beasts roll across the plains. Dragons flying in and out of clouds. Old witch tossing bones.  Women scratching the ground covered in mud.  Hunters tighten their grip on spears. All eyes looking up.  As the land catches fire. ...Read On


Have you ever gotten so high that you touched the sky, Perhaps drunken with no recollection? Did you ever wish sometimes that you Could redo what life did to you?   Have you ever been so vulnerable that you retreated To your younger self, like you're under a spell? Do you wish to be with someone, who'd keep You safely, loving you by your side.   Or wouldn't it be nice to travel...Read On


The story of never have and already lost

There are two regrets in life : You get what you don’t want. Or, you don’t get what you want.

  The spider = Zhu Er     The nectar = Gan Lu     The little grass = Prince Zhi Cao     The strong wind = Princess Windy       Once upon a time, a spider spun its web on the transom in a prosperous temple. She was influenced by the Buddha-nature after a thousand years of the burning incense and worship there. Buddha came in one day and said to the...Read On


Randy Thoughts & Stuff, #2

Last night, when I was saying my prayers, I asked God to make outer space a little bit smaller and to make everything in it a little bit closer, so we could visit some of those places without having to use, like, a trillion gallons of gasoline. That seems like a waste to me. I don’t understand why galaxies are so far away from each other. Talk about sprawl. ♦ As I’ve said, my paperboy...Read On