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Unfortunately/Fortunately

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The first person states an unfortunate event and the next person says a fortunate response.

Example:
I say:

Unfortunately I tripped the stairs lastn ight when I got home.

Next poster says:

Fortunately you were sooooo drunk that you didn't feel it.

Next poster says:

Unfortunately I have to get up when he alarm goes off.

Next poster says:

Fortunately when you get to work your boss gives you a raise.

Lets start:

Unfortunately the raise come's with consequences that involve you handing over your chocolate delights.
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fortunately, the raise is enough that you can afford your own stash of chocolate delights and still leave money to spend
If life seems jolly rotten
there's something you've forgotten
and that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing

from Monty Python's "Life of Brian"
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Unfortunately I get robbed by a scouser
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Fortunately, the Liverpool police act fast, grab the thief and return the whole loot to you
If life seems jolly rotten
there's something you've forgotten
and that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing

from Monty Python's "Life of Brian"
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Unfortunately the Liverpool police/scouse police are corrupt and I do not get my chocolate back.
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fortunately, your raise gave you enough financial leeway to move to Brussels and buy the best Belgian chocolate there is ( and that's really gooooood)
If life seems jolly rotten
there's something you've forgotten
and that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing

from Monty Python's "Life of Brian"
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Unfortinaltely my flee leaves me with lack of funds and they only offer me chocolate coated brussel sprouts.
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Fortunately your neighbour has no sense of taste and buys your chocolate-coated sprouts from you at a grossly inflated price.
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Unfortunately you are my neighbour and they give you indigestion.
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unfortunately authorised is allergic to garlic and gets hives
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Fortunately Rascal also owns a cow farm and can help alleviate Authorised's itching.

Lurker
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Unfortunately while Authorized is geting his itch scrathed, someone comes along and trys to milk him .
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fortunately ajax is a perfect milker
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Unfortunately Andy hates being milked with callused hands, so he kicks Ajax out of the barn
If life seems jolly rotten
there's something you've forgotten
and that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing

from Monty Python's "Life of Brian"
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Fortunately Authorised's aim is off and he kicks Paul instead
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Unfortunately the momentum of his kick topples Andy over and he falls into the menurepit, dragging Ajax and Kiera with him.
If life seems jolly rotten
there's something you've forgotten
and that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing

from Monty Python's "Life of Brian"
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fortunately i was able to pull my kk out and bathe her clean
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unfortunately, you've left Ajax neckdeep in the menure
If life seems jolly rotten
there's something you've forgotten
and that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing

from Monty Python's "Life of Brian"
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fortunately..... oops
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LMFAO xo

Unfortunately Ajax thinks Paul was my saviour and climbs out and hugs him.
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Fortunately Ginger's kingsize bathtub was still filled so we both could soak the smell of dung out of our skins
If life seems jolly rotten
there's something you've forgotten
and that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing

from Monty Python's "Life of Brian"
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Unfortunately Authorised is still in the manure pit.
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Fortunately the emergency services show up after only 5 hours and drag Andy out of the pit, smelly, but unscaved
If life seems jolly rotten
there's something you've forgotten
and that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing

from Monty Python's "Life of Brian"
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Unfortunately the force of the Fire brigades hose blasts Authorised right back into the manure abyss.
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fortunately Andy ricochets of the surface like a pebble and he ends up high and dry in the haystack
If life seems jolly rotten
there's something you've forgotten
and that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing

from Monty Python's "Life of Brian"
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Unfortunately you ricocheted from a random blast from the hose and were not so fortunate.
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fortunately I hit the wall so hard, I didn't even remember it hurt
If life seems jolly rotten
there's something you've forgotten
and that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing

from Monty Python's "Life of Brian"
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Unfortunately you slide down the wall and straight back into the manure pit.
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fortunately you were there to catch paul