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Children Are Quick...

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Children Are Quick
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TEACHER: Why are you late?
STUDENT: Class started before I got here.
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TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O- D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
(I Love this child)
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TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
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TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
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TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.
Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.....
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TEACHER: Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's.. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.

(I want to adopt this kid!!!)
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TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
I once knew a drinker who had a moderating problem...

Active Ink Slinger
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Kids always come out with the best lines.
Active Ink Slinger
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Kids do say the darnedest things.
"No one knows when the final grain of sand will plummet through their own personal Hourglass." ~ CKAcres
"If you really want to make a difference, don't over think it, just do it..."
"Scars of life are deeply etched within the minds of curious old souls."
Administration
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If you want an honest opinion, just ask a child.

“Many people hear voices when no one is there. Some of them are called mad and are shut up in rooms where they stare at the walls all day. Others are called writers and they do pretty much the same thing.”

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Children don't filter their feelings or their thoughts.. bless them for it..
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TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!

That's right they didnt! lmao
~purple addict~
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I remember David Letterman asking a young boy how tall the boy was.

The boy answered by holding his hand level to the top of his head and saying,"This tall."
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we sure are..
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The question was asked of me, "Andrew, do you think that dinosaurs read newspapers?"

To which, I answered "they might have done, there are a couple of dino species still alive, anyway. I bet they're the ones who sat there with their newspapers, saying:

'Oh, look, Maude, there's an apocalypse scheduled.'

'Well, Harry, better get out of here.'

And then they went into hiding until it was safe."

The teacher could do nothing but laugh, and try to steer the topic back into seriousness, but it was too late, I'd already run with it and made it into a wee play.
Ghosts, flamingos, guitars and vodka. Eclectic subjects, eccentric stories:

Humorous guide & Recommended Read =^.^= How To Make a Cup of Tea
A flash fiction series :) A Random Moment in Time
Editors' Pick! :D I Am The Deep, Dark Woods
And another EP!: The Fragility of Age
=^.^=