I turned very slowly and kept my hands in sight. A very deep female voice rumbled, "Don't move a muscle. What puny male is it that invades the Amazon Domain?"

"I am Goodgulf, son of Greatgulf, son of Grandgulf, son of Greatgrandgulf, son of Chuck." I had never said that out loud until that moment and it suddenly struck me that my family hadn't used much imagination when it came to naming people. "And this is my companion Nell."

The leader of the Amazons stood about nine feet tall. She lowered her bow and said, "We know who your pervert companion is. Why are you here?"

Now Nell was angry with my because I hadn't told her my plan for getting passed the troll. Maybe I should be completely honest with the Amazons about my mission and I also was seeing something strange with my second sight. I could see some sort of mist that was obscuring the sight of all of the Amazons but Nell. It looked like an old spell that was starting to unravel.

"I was hired by the Ogre King to return his crown to him." I could see Nell wince at my honesty.

"So you admit that you are here to steal our Queen's crown? Why shouldn't we kill you right now?"

"I admit nothing of the sort. I come in peace to try to make a deal for the crown. I have already passed two of the tests. I wish to take the third." I was nervous about how this was going.

Several of the Amazons crowded around Nell and me and removed our backpacks and weapons. They missed the wand I had hidden in my boot but it wasn't like I was really worried about the items that they were taking.

"We are going to take the two of you to Queen Eris for judgement. We will see if you are allowed to take the third test."

"You don't have to keep pointing those arrows at us. I wish to be taken to your queen so I certainly wouldn't try to escape or cause trouble of any sort." I didn't really want somebody to accidentally lose her grip on her arrow and shoot me.

"You don't worry us in the slightest but we know your pervert companion to be quite skilled so you are our hostage for her good behavior. She was never to return here and must now face her judgement."

I thought about that fact and I knew I wasn't about to let anything bad happen to Nell and I wasn't too happy that the Amazons kept referring to her as a pervert. But then they were underestimating a wizard so I knew I had an advantage over them.

Nell and I were taken along the paths in the forest to the main Amazon village. It was almost laughable as we walked when the Amazons, without realizing what they were doing, started handing our backpacks and weapons to us. Nell gave me a side long look and I just smiled at her. I always loved the way that spell worked.

-Nice to have you back Swayvill, I felt a bit vulnerable without you.-

-Shut up Goodgulf and try to get us out of this mess. You actually told the Amazons the truth?-

-You sound surprised Swayvill. You know that I am lazy enough to take the easiest road possible.-

-How is this easy?-

-Well, I now have an escort of heavily armed, scantily clad Amazon warrior babes taking me where I want to go. It beats trying to fight my way there.-

-Maybe you are using your brain but I wouldn't say that to Nell if I were you.-

-No doubt, Swayvill, no doubt.-

We arrived at the Amazon village and were taken straight to the Queen. She was located in a large two story wooden structure. I think she would have been about 10 feet tall if she stood. She was sitting on a large wooden throne. She would have been very attractive but she had something of a cruel look to her face. I think it was her attitude toward others, it was all rather arrogant. The mist I sensed with my second sight was very heavy over her eyes.

"So I see my daughter the perverted Princess Penelope has returned with her puny lover/pet." She said this with a very obvious sneer to her voice.

-Nell is a princess? Who knew?-

-Shut up Swayvill.-

Before Nell could respond I stepped forward and addressed the Queen. "I am Goodgulf and I have passed the first two tests for the crown and I wish to take the third test."

"Fine, guards, bring the manacles, I think the perverted little princess will be the volunteer that helps the little wizard with the third test."

I stood still as one of the guards shackled my left ankle to a ring set into the floor and another guard shackled Nell in the same manor to another ring next to mine. My wrists were then shackled and Nell's wrists as well but when she was shackled the chain was looped through the ring formed by my arms and shackles.

"The test is that you must un-loop the shackles without removing them." The Queen said this with great malice. "Usually we let anybody that attempts this to be set free if he or she admits defeat but I think we will keep you two as an example of what happens when people over reach their abilities. I think we will leave you two love birds alone for a few hours so you can get to know each other better, you two will be together for a long time to come."

All of the Amazons left The building leaving Nell and me alone. We both sat on the floor together and I looked at Nell's face.

"I think I have figured out what is actually happening here. Nell, are the Amazons actually ogresses?"

"Yes, we are ogresses. My mother is Queen Eris and my father is King Crusher. I saw you the day you were brought to Crusher by my twin brother Smasher. I thought you were cute and I wanted to help you."

"That would explain your teeth, and it tells me why you don't seem to be suffering from a curse all of the other Amazons seem to have. Generational curses don't work we'll on twins. But I don't know how the curse affects the Amazon's sight. Are you the crown princess?"

"No, that would be my older sister, the perfect Princess Persephone. She is a mean bitch just like my mother. You know that even if you pass this test she won't let you leave the village with that crown."

"I have some ideas concerning how I am going to leave here but for now, watch this." I moved the chain connecting my wrists over to the manacle around her right wrist. I then pulled the chain through that manacle and over her hand so the chain slipped back through the manacle and we were no longer connected.

"Nobody has ever done that before. That is amazing Goodgulf!"

"Weaving spells is a lot like this sometimes. Remember how the answer to the door was in plain sight? Most people would have made this very difficult. So why were you at the Ogre village and why are you exiled?"

"I am exiled because I refused the marriage that my mother had arranged for me. Mauler is a big dumb bully that is two years older than me. He used to pick on Smasher until Smasher got fed up and kicked the living crap out him. Mom picked him because Mauler would have made me miserable. I always liked small males better, hence I am considered a pervert."

"I am sorry that your mother is such a bitch Nell. I know how important family can be and this just sucks."

"I always was running away from the Amazons to the Ogre village, I liked being with my father and brother better than being here. I don't know if I will ever be able to leave here again."

"We will be leaving here tomorrow. When you hear me talking to your mother and getting all of the Amazons to look at me keep your eyes averted from me, or better yet just look down and close your eyes. I will be creating a diversion so use it to escape. Meet me at my cabin, hopefully I will have the crown for your father."

I looked closely at Nell. "I want you to know that I am so sorry for not telling you what I had planned at the troll bridge. I hope you will forgive me and know that I will never lie to you again."

"Forget about it Goodgulf, you did what had to be done and I forgave you when the Amazons handed all of my weapons and backpack to me."

"Thank you Nell, you have become very important to me. I don't know what I would do without you."

"Goodgulf, why don't you shut up and show me how important that I am to you?"

So I did.