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Desire of the Samurai Chapter Five

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Aikasa laid awake staring at her ceiling. The day didn’t go against her better judgment for it was still raining outside and she didn’t know how she was supposed to go and meet Kenji.

 Well...

 The hell with it.

 It’s now or never.

She got up and headed to the bathroom to wash herself. She slipped out of her nightdress and put a comfortable one that would suit this harsh weather. She then combed her long wavy hair and stalked outside of her room to their front gate. Opening her umbrella, she walked to Kenji and her’s meeting place.

The riverside.

While walking, she was hoping that he’d be there. She kept walking until the river was in her view. She took a glance at her wristwatch. 

9:10 A.M.

Aikasa he waited. Minutes turned into hours. She took a glance at her wristwatch again. 

11:24 A.M.

She was already soaked and shivering. She started thinking that she was such a fool. As she started walking away, she suddenly heard his voice.

“What are you doing here?”

Startled, Aikasa quickly faced him. He’s not wearing his typical kimono today. A caramel colored sweater and a faded washed jeans, his hair was swept aside to reveal his coffee crumbled eyes that has always mesmerized her while standing under his umbrella. 

He’s really astounding.

“Well? Are you done checking me out?” Kenji smirked.

This conceited worthy-to-be-drooled man!

Aikasa huffed and looked away from him. Suddenly, she felt like there was some tall post looming over her. She turned around and saw Kenji standing before her, holding the umbrella over them. He had that mischievous glint in his eyes while smiling down at her. The same mischievous glint she was very familiar with since they were kids. 

Before she could open her mouth to ask him, she was already hauled at his strong shoulders and became faced to face with his lean back. Startled, Aikasa started punching Kenji’s back.

“Hey! Put me down this instant! Kenji! I said put me down- hey! What are you doing?” she started panicking.

“Hold your breath, princess,” he whispered.

Before she could even say anything, Kenji jumped on the river. 

Aikasa was engulfed by the very cold river. She squirmed her way out of Kenji’s grip but that only made him pull her towards his hard chest. 

Kenji put his arms around Aikasa’s waist and before she could protest on what he was doing, he kissed her.

Eyes wide open, and Aikasa tensed. She started wiggling herself out of his grip but he just tightened his hold on her and continued kissing her passionately. Thinking that it’s hopeless to fight him, Aikasa cupped his face and responded to his kiss as passionately.

She was running out of air and guessed that he was too because he broke the kiss and hoisted them up into the surface. They both gasped for air. When they recovered, Aikasa slapped Kenji on his chest. Hard.

“Ow! What was that for?” Kenji groaned while rubbing his chest.

“Don’t ever do that again!” Aikasa yelled.

“What? Kissing you?” Kenji smirked. The man had the guts to smirk at Aikasa. 

“No! Not that!” Aikasa exasperatingly said putting her hands on her chest while gasping for air.

“Then what?” Kenji asked, the grin was still plastered on his handsome face. 

“The picking-me-up-and-jumping-off-the-river-thing. Don’t do that ever again!” she said to him defensibly.

“Oh.” Kenji’s mouth forming an O shape. “So you loved the kiss then?” He teased and burst out laughing.

What? This jerk!’ Aikasa thought.

If only Aikasa didn’t love him, she would have gladly chopped his head off of his body.

“Oh shut it, will you?” she groaned while glaring daggers at him. Her face warmed.

Kenji laughed one more time and tried his hardest to stop himself until all Aikasa heard was snickers. She flatly stared up at him.

“Alright! Alright! I’ll stop. It’s just that you are too cute. I couldn’t help it,” Kenji said while flashing his infamous smile at Aikasa.

“Why did you do it anyway?” Ignoring his compliment, Aikasa retorted.

“Did what?” Kenji teasingly asked while wiggling both his eyebrows.

“Don’t play games with me, Kenji-san. We both know what you did,” she pressed, one eyebrow going up.

The smile on Kenji’s face slowly disappeared and he remained quiet. He slowly pulled Aikasa against him as he holds her closer.

“Lately, I have this lingering feeling that you will leave me soon. I don’t know where these feelings are coming from and I do not even understand. I just don’t want to feel it. I feel scared and at the same time ridiculous. You’re not leaving, right?” Kenji quietly asked staring at her with sad eyes.

Aikasa stiffened and remembered the reason why she came here in the first place. She looked up to meet his gaze. Aikasa felt that she would not get tired of staring at his face. 

“Is something wrong?” Kenji asked frowning.

She cupped his face. Kenji’s stubble was tickling her palm. Aikasa caressed his face as Kenji took hold of her hand. 

“I have something to tell you,” Aikasa whispered to Kenji. 

She slowly took her hand away from him and turned her back at him. She couldn’t meet his gaze. She knew soon Kenji will discover that she’s going to leave him. Aikasa remained there standing. Her heart beating fast. Taking a deep breath, Aikasa faced Kenji and met his wary but confused gaze.

“What is it, Aikasa? What is this thing you want to tell me?” he quietly asked.

Her tears were threateningly starting to fall but she willed herself to stop it. Aikasa looked at Kenji straight in the eyes. 

He has the rights to know.

She stepped closer towards Kenji.

“Kenji...” she whispered, “I am leaving.” 

“Oh. Where are you going? When are you coming back?” Kenji asked.

“I don’t know,” she quietly muttered.

“What do you mean ‘you don’t know’?” Kenji slowly asked. Confusion was clearly in his voice.

“Don’t you get it? I am leaving you,” Aikasa sadly told him.

Kenji remained there standing, staring down at Aikasa. Shocked was visible in his eyes. Waiting for the information to sink in, Aikasa approached him but Kenji stepped away. She was hurt but he was hurt too.

“Why? Why do you have to leave?” he asked. Aikasa looked up at him and instantly regretted it. He was calm outside but she knew that he was a total mess inside.

“I got the scholarship at the university I was talking about,” she murmured. 

That scholarship? I thought we already talked about this. Aikasa, you promised way back then that you’re not going to pursue it and leave!” Kenji growled, starting to breathe raggedly. His both hands were clenched in fist.

“But Kenji, it is my dream. How am I supposed to give up my dreams when it is the only thing my heart desires?” Aikasa argued.

“You promised, Aikasa. You promised to me that you’re not going to leave!” Kenji shouted.

“The hell with that promise!” Aikasa shouted back at Kenji while throwing her hands up. “I have been working hard for this opportunity Kenji and now that it is here, I will never let anything or anyone stop me from getting it.” Gritting her teeth, Aikasa glared back at him.

“What about me?” Kenji softly asked. Pain was visible in his eyes.

“Don’t be so selfish. My world isn’t only spinning around you,” Aikasa spatted. The rage was slowly consuming her but the moment those words came out of Aikasa’s mouth, she instantly regretted it. She saw hurt in Kenji’s eyes but he quickly masked it into anger.

“Ha! So now I am being the selfish one here?” Kenji snarled at her.

“No, I didn’t mean it like that. I am sorry. Kenji-”

“You know what? Fine! Leave me. From now onward, I’m not going to care about you,” Kenji roared. And with that, he walked away from Aikasa. 

Aikasa tried to stop him but Kenji was walking way too fast. She ran after him and closed the distance between them. Aikasa wrapped her hands on Kenji’s waist tightly.

“Kenji… I am sorry.” She finally let the tears pour out of her eyes.

“When did you found out?” Kenji calmly asked.

Aikasa removed herself from hugging Kenji and stand in front of him.

“Last month. I swear! I planned to tell you sooner but I have no time,” Aikasa blurted.

Kenji coldly stared down at her saying nothing. After some time, he finally broke the silence.

“When is your departure?” he asked.

“Last week of this month,” Aikasa whispered while looking at the ground.

“No one could ever stop you. Even I right?” Kenji rasped.

Aikasa nodded. Not trusting herself to speak.

“Well then, have fun with your dreams,” Kenji bitterly hissed and stalked away from Aikasa.

Aikasa hopelessly stared at his back while her tears were continuously flowing out of her eyes. And worst of it was that she couldn’t do anything about it. 

She waited that maybe Kenji would have a change of heart and walk back to her saying that he understands and that he would support her on this dream of hers but no such luck, he kept walking away; not giving even one last glance.

Aikasa slumped into the ground and let out a sob. She did not expected that it would end up like this. She was really hurt watching Kenji walk away from her. The painful feeling was too much she couldn’t stop the whimpers from coming out of her mouth. But she had to sacrifice for her dreams to come true even if that would mean sacrificing the only man she will ever love.  

 

Published 
Written by FrustratedSpeaker
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