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The Wig

"Madeline was convinced the wig was evil. But was it?"

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THE WIG (Chapter One)

Madaline and Luna were room-mates, both in their mid twenties. On the outside, they looked like complete opposites. Madaline was a bit on the chunky side. She weighed over 200 pounds, and wore a size 18. Once in a while, she could squeeze into a Walmart size 16...if she was lucky.

She had acne and medium length thin brown hair that hung like lifeless strands of spaggetti around her chubby, formless face.

Luna, on the other hand, was tiny as could be; a little slip of a person. She weighed just over 100 pounds, and could wear a size one. Most people think that women who can wear a size one are an urban legend, but they do exist. Luna was proof.

But Luna didn't go around bragging about being tiny and slim. Instead, she slunk around life like a starved mouse...she almost looked like a mouse, with her boyishly short black hair, and her yellow teeth.

The one thing Madaline and Luna did have in common, in case you could not figure it out, was that they both had extremely low self esteem. They were both achingly single, although they longed for steady boyfriends. But any guys they did meet, were instantly turned off by their bitter, jealous attitudes.

They would sit for hours on the dingy gray couch that used to be white in their cluttered apartment, complaining about "The Beautiful Women." Only, they didn't call them "The Beautiful Women." They called them other things, like "That Bitch," or "That Annoying Slut."

Misery loved company.

"Look at that annoying slut on TV!" Madaline would complain. "There's no way that hair is all hers."

"Definitely extensions," Luna concurred. "You can tell by the way it hangs on the bottom. Also looks like she had those gross lip injections."

"Why do men like women like that so much?" Madaline lamented.

"No clue," Luna remarked, sounding pissed off.

Besides sitting around complaining about other women, Madeline and Luna had their own hobbies. Madeline was into gardening. Digging in the earth was a great outlet for all her hostility. Besides, plants didn't care how much you weighed, or how bad your skin was.

Luna, on the other hand, was into Live Action Role Playing, otherwise known as "larping." She loved dressing up as other people, or as an elf or a fairy, and meeting up with a bunch of other geeks who loved dressing up. Then they would act out some weird scenario that often involved the end of the earth.

One time, Madeline went to watch one of these larping events. She spent the whole time stuffing herself with pizza and complaining to some bored guy about "That Slut" who was prancing around in a mini skirt and fishnets. The bored guy ended up leaving with "That Slut." Madeline never went to another larping event after that.

Madeline and Luna each held (just barely))boring customer service jobs; although not at the same company. Hatred of their job was something else they had in common - complaining about "All Those Sluts and Bitches" who worked with them.

One day, as Madeline sat on the dingy gray couch steaming about "That Bitch" on TV who was trying to sell her shampoo, she heard Luna come in the back door, home from work. Madeline temporarily felt happy; knowing she would soon have someone to share her bitchy mood with.

But instead of slinking into the livingroom like usual, Luna literaly danced into the room, clutching a big purple bag. Madeline was familiar with that purple bag. She saw it all the time. It was a bag from the Uptown Costume shop, a favorite haunt of Luna and all those other geek larpers.

"You'll never guess what I bought!" Luna exclaimed.

Madeline could indeed guess. It was either a new set of fairy wings, or some fake rubber ears Luna could wear when she was pretending to be an elf.

"Show me!" Madeline proclaimed, pretending to share Luna's enthusiasm for the contents of the purple bag.

Madeline noted that Luna's cheeks looked especially flushed today. She also noticed, with annoyance, that Luna looked almost...pretty.

Luna reached into the purple bag. But instead of lifting out some lame rubber ears or a pair of sparkly wings, she held a bunch of glossy....hair?

"IT'S A WIG!" Luna squealed.

Luna did not usually squeal.

Immediately, Madeline was on high alert. She felt a flash of pure anger slice through her. The word "traitor" popped into her mind.

"LOOK! LOOK!" Luna squealed, shaking out the glossy hair for Madeline's benefit.

The wig was a deep auburn color. It was long...very long, with long sweeping bangs, and luxurious banana curls at the bottom.

"Wait till you see how it looks on me!" Luna said. "It's unbelievable!"

"Why did you buy that thing?" Madeline spat. She knew she sounded bitchy, but she didn't care.

"I'm going to wear it at my next larp!" Luna declared. "Besides...it's fun to look like a different person sometimes...you know?"

"No, I do not!" Madeline grumped.

Luna didn't even seem to notice Madeline's bad mood.

"Come see how great it looks!" Luna said.

Madeline heaved herself off the couch and followed her tiny roomate down the dark hallway, to the dingy dirty bathroom they shared.

Luna yanked the wig over her short pixie hair. Then she adjusted it here and there. As soon as the wig was on her head, Luna's expression changed...as though she was indeed another person! She flashed her reflection a flirtatous grin.

This was no longer the Luna Madeline knew...the insecure, shrinking violet of a Luna. Suddenly, Luna looked...smug...like all those other hordes of "Beautiful Women" on TV.

Madeline felt insensed.

"Well?" Luna asked, turning away from the streaked mirror and facing Madeline. "What do you think?"

Luna's voice even sounded different. Lilting, higher-pitched; sort of ...sassy.

"Isn't it great?" Luna squealed, twirling around, and then posing for Madeline. "Don't you think this is the perfect wig for an elf to wear?"

"Absolutely not!" Madeline declared. "It looks more like the perfect wig for a hooker to wear!"

Luna burst out laughing.

"YOU'RE FUNNY!" she shrieked.

Nothing Madeline said could penetrate Luna's newfound bubble of confidence that was brought on by this maddening new intruder into their lives, the wig.

"You shouldn't have wasted your money!" Madeline informed her. "How much did you spend on that thing, anyway?"

"Thirty eight dollars, and it's worth every cent!" Luna exclaimed.

Thirty eight dollars was way above Luna's usual "Larping clothes budget." She usually bought items on sale for under ten dollars. That's because neither Madeline nor Luna made much at their crummy customer service jobs. Plus, they had to buy food, pay for rent, electric, phone, gas, TV and Internet, and oil heating - which, in the winter, could run them over $300 a month.

"You're crazy!" Madeline declared.

"Well at least I'm crazy with good hair!" Luna sang out. Then she exploded into a fit of giggles.

Madeline eyed Luna with hostility, as Luna blew a kiss at herself into the streaked mirror.

"I think I'm going to get a whole bunch of new make-up tomorow," Luna decided. "And some of that new tooth whitening toothpaste...you know, from Crest?"

In truth, the wig literaly transformed Madeline's former mousy plain roomate into a very attractive girl. The way the dark auburn curls bounced Luxuriously past Luna's shoulders; the way the long sweeping bags cheekily framed her pixie-like face...the wig made Luna look like a model.

It was more than Madeline could take. She stalked off and spent the rest of the night sulking on the couch, watching old movies so at least she could feel comforted by the fact that the "Bitch" in the movie was now old.

Luna never joined her.

Madeline tried to pay attention to the movie, but she couldn't. The wig was taking over her thoughts; her brain; her very being! Madeline was convinced the wig was evil. As she sat there steaming, she concocted a plan. An equally evil plan to get rid of it.

Published 
Written by orangepink
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