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the dead parrot

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a sequel to A Scientist and a Dead Bird

Yoro, the leader of the controlling particle, tapped his fingers on his desk. He had read the reports and they didn’t look good. There was kidney failure caused by all the Doritos he’d let the parrot eat. There were heart problems, and an aneurysm forming. The whole body was in acute pain, and needed to be shut down.

Doritos are yummy.

Are they worth it?

“It looks bad.” Bjork, his second, said.

“I’m going to miss this. It wasn’t what I’d dreamed it would be. The commander of a captive parrot isn’t the same as being the commander of a free bird. It’s sad really,” said Yoro.

“I know what you mean. This is the first time I’ve thought of forming a virus and taking revenge after a life,” said Bjork.

Yoro stood up and walked to the corner of his office and flipped the red switch.

Mickey, the parrot died.

Minnie, the parrot’s wife, screamed.

The prick scientist, whose wife owned the parrots, came running. He held the dead bird and looked into its dead eyes.

Yoro hadn’t shut down the nerves to the eyes yet, so he could see the man.

“Too bad I shut down muscle control,” said Yoro.

“Yea, it’d be fun to bite him,” said Bjork. They laughed.

They were surprised that the scientist began drilling into the skull and poking the body of the bird with probes.

“This is really weird,” said Bjork.

“I thought they’d just drop us in the trash, maybe bury us in the back yard. Torrie in pancreas says that’s what they do with dogs,” said Yoro.

“I don’t know many of the morons who control humans, they think funny,” said Bjork.

Minnie screamed again. The hearing and emotion were still online so a surge of sadness and emotional pain coursed through the dead bird.

The scientist bent low over the dead bird and began whispering.

Bjork tried to decipher what he said while he listened. He shook his head. “I wish humans would speak in tone. I can say almost anything with one word, just inflected in different ways to mean anything. Humans assign thousands of words to thousands of things, even though they talk painfully slow, there’s no keeping track.”

Yoro sent a general message to the inhabited particles within the dead bird: “Abandon parrot, we are not alive anymore. You have permission to join the clean-up bacteria. You have permission to disperse. It’s been a pleasure living with you, and I hope to build another great organism with you some day. Remember to avoid eating Doritos in the future. Good bye.”

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