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Walking Standing still

A daily whirlwind of emotion put on paper

There must be some way of understanding

that will remove the fear of a second wave

Sitting in the rebuilt glory, of the aftermath

Belief that everything can be this calm

is wavered out of instinctual protection.

But there is a faith in something bigger

Trauma still threatens to over take

and many days are still spent fighting down 

those scars of each self inflicted dagger

I often try for descriptive and raw

as it is the only way in which to describe

That which is felt and not written

So much is left out though

And it seems impossible to me 

That it will ever express

A life of writing the same old song.

Repeating in a skipping record player

using thoughts of those passed by as tracts

With every sparkle in my eye

there is a thought of something sadder

as if my soul has something it is not sharing

Pictured is an Eden I often dreamt of

Athena guarding each of my untrained thoughts

building me into this guarded soldier

Do not let my appearance of helplessness distract you

For I have learned how to fight my demons

and even as the darkness circles

flying and closing in from above me

I can see that I will survive,

Picturing visions of where I am

Who I am

and my personal pursuit of peace and knowledge.

i can see a place not far from now,

Where all the pain will feel so far away.

So for now the daily dagger will remain

a reminder.

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