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My worst wedding reception

A True Story

This event actually occurred during my brief engagement to a lady I will call Daria. Prior to our meeting and getting serious she had been asked to be the maid- of- honor at her long time friend's wedding.

It was too late for her to bow out now and she had given her word, and I understood that. Now I would be unable to attend the wedding ceremony due to my job, and Daria understood that. She informed me that the best man had a similar problem and a stand in would be used for the church, but he would make the reception.

So on the second Saturday of the month we headed to the banquet hall. Upon our arrival, I was introduced to the happy couple and the rest of the bridal party and they all seemed like good people.

Everything was fine and then until the best man arrived that things began to go South.

He was a short bearded guy that was trying to act tough to impress his friends. When he laid eyes on Daria his eyes almost popped from his head and a smile crossed his face. Daria was a tall and slender brunette with drop dead looks that always attracted the attention of the men we encountered, and that was my personal Hell to deal with.

You see, way back then I had some serious jealousy issues and always reacted negatively to anyone that tried to flirt with the lady I was with. It had been the cause of more than one fight between myself and whatever girl I was seeing and the reason behind more than one breakup.

I somehow managed to be polite and ignore his leering when we were introduced.

"He's a bouncer at the Side Door," Daria added with a small touch of pride.

"The Side Door? I kicked a few bouncer's asses there, "the short guy responded with a smile.

"Only in your dreams," I snarled in response.

 He gave Daria a hug and at the last second planted a kiss on the cheek, he then threw a smirk in my direction. I did the only thing I could get away aside of beating his face in, I growled. I had learned how to do this years ago and it has always startled the recipients of it.

"Christmas, he growled like a fuckin animal," he responded in a startled voice as the color drained from his face. He was then hustled away by a couple of the other groomsmen.

Now I faced Daria's wrath.

"Was that really necessary? He just gave me a hug and a kiss on the cheek."

"You didn't see the smirk he tossed me. He's lucky that this is a wedding or I'd have tossed his ass out the window."

We both glared at each other for a moment before we decided to let it rest and enjoy the cocktail hour. About an hour later it was time for dinner and the guests began to filter to the tables.

"You know you can't sit with me at the bridal table," Daria informed me.

"Yes I know."

"You can sit next to the best man's wife," she responded.

The best mans wife was seated at one of the tables reserved for family members, it was close to the bridal table. As we approached the table I realized why the best man acted the way he did when he saw Daria. His wife resembled three hundred pounds of pizza dough stuffed into a cocktail dress.

I took my seat next to her and glanced at the bridal table. The best man was pouring Daria more wine and managed to place a hand on her shoulder when he did. When he leaned into her to whisper something in her ear his hand always drifted to her shoulder.

I sat there suddenly getting angrier by the minute and weighing the consequences of walking up there and punching him in the face when I heard someone call my name. I looked up and saw it was Liz and Beth, Darla's college chums. They were just as attractive as she was, maybe even more.

"Why are you sitting here by yourself? Come on and sit with us," Beth said and I quickly left my seat and they escorted me to the back of the room.

"Hey, look who we found?" they announced to the two other girls already seated there. It was Linda and Karla, more of Daria's college chums. As with Liz and Beth these girls also processed drop dead looks.

"You ladies by yourself?" I questioned as I slid into a chair.

"Yeah, none of us are seeing anyone at the moment so we decided to attend as a group, " Karla responded.

My butt had not settled into the seat cushion when Daria appeared at my side, she didn't look happy.

"Why are you back here?" Daria questioned.

"We invited him so he didn't have to sit next to that pasty faced blob of human flesh," Beth answered.

"Or watch the best man flirting with you," Liz stated.

"He wasn't flirting, he was being nice, Daria responded moving closer to me.

"Oh come off it. Are you blind? He can't say a word to you without placing a hand on your arm or shoulders," Linda added.

"If the situations were reversed you would have been ready to tear the bitch's face off," Beth interjected.

Daria returned to the bridal table as they were serving the main course and I remained at the table of four of the sexiest ladies in the place. We all had a grand time laughing and joking and as soon as dinner ended Daria returned to our table.

Daria stayed with us for the rest of the evening. When it came time for the bridal dance she responded to her name being called from our table. She would quickly return as soon as the dance ended. I was told that the best man had a sour look on his face for the remainder of the evening.

Finally it was time to go. I bid all the girls a good night and thanked them for rescuing me. We were at the side door ready to walk out when the best man appeared again to bid us goodbye. He looked like he was going to give her a hug but planted a kiss on her lips, he then smirked at me again.

"You son of a bitch,"I bellowed.

Now this tough guy that had allegedly kicked some bouncers asses at the place I worked ran out the door at full speed. He figured that a guy my size couldn't catch him, he almost wet himself when he discovered that I was less that a foot away.

He cut across the parking lot with me hot on his heels and somehow managed to dive into the passenger window of a car driven my his fat wife. She then tore off down the street with his legs still sticking out the window.

I returned to the entrance where Daria stood fuming. The groom approached and apologized for his buddy's actions as he had seen the whole thing. We exited and were walking to my car while arguing about my actions. That's when Daria's chums caught up with us, seems they had overheard our discussion and saw the whole incident.

Then without warning Beth placed her warm lips on mine and kissed me. Daria's face showed shock and anger

"What the hell is wrong with you? I'm standing right here," she questioned her friend.

"Nothing is wrong with me, but now you know how he felt when that punk kissed you, " Beth responded.

The girls bid us goodnight and headed to their cars. I reached mine and Daria and I fought about it all the way home.

It was one of the worst receptions I had ever attended.

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