Another day has passed with some carrying the ghosts of the past that hide in the shadows, and in the smoke carried in those wounded eyes. Being like some sort of fatal attraction where one can lose themselves, as long as they don’t lose control. Looking for the light and it feels as if the someone shut off the power and they sit there in the dark, like they are sitting in a cell with the walls making them feel so small. Yet, they have the gall to sit and ridicule me as I make my way down the line, passing all of those auto graveyards, tumbled down farms, and shacks. I have been likened to some kind of a wanderin’ ghost, or a roving sign as well as a few other things, but then again what cares I for their words of praise?
Free to be where I am and knowing what I am looking for and why should I care about it all since it’s what I need to do like the Who’s Seeker looking for the answers to the questions I have had. Standing tall after having been down for so long and knowing if I give up I will have nothing at all. Things and people have gone away and like Dylan said once they will appear and disappear like smoke, so there is no real surprise or reason to get upset. Yet, still there is that feeling of loss when you hit the ground with everything moving at times in mysterious ways, with things in most cases being alright. Sometimes following a feeling as I make my way down these roads the Tao directs me to, and knowing in some cases my boots are pointed away and there should be no reason to look back but some always do.
Having had to come to terms with some things and seem to have been running instead of learning how to live with memories. When asked where I have been or heading to, I just mention that I don’t know where to begin and I have been there and back again. Knowing that one day the hands of time will tick no more, and the darkness will fall across the door. I might be like that lone soldier who lost every fight but ended up winning the war, or I could be in that old grave yard where those lie forgotten in and under the earth and be better off dead and just be a quitter. But, my heart won’t let me give in and do the best with the rest that I have left, hiding regrets and carrying those scars like souvenirs so that I won’t forget.
Having shouldered my share of; ifs, ands, and buts. After having pushed both patience and luck until it was time to just give up, and make my way on down the line. With there being times when I have been weak and tired, and sometimes uninspired as I continue on down these back roads. With some saying I’m out to pasture as I hear them saying this and that, and change it every other day in one breath, and with the next hearing them say it just doesn’t matter. I hear them all as I take it all in play by play, and though the story might be sad we don’t need the ladies cryin’. Wondering if they know about hope, and faith, or what it means to make sacrifices when the darkness falls? Or the price of pain and having to get by, with the skin of your teeth?
Having heart to carry on when all things are under attack, and be able to stand tall when the odds are stacked. Making me wonder if I am one of the ones born to rise, and bring the rain? All in all, I continue to carry on with the fire I carry inside, and if I have to go to war it will be with the ones I trust. And to them I ask to come with me now day in and day out, and be like good old bricks brave and true no matter the pinch or kicks.
Copyright: Timberwolf International LTD. November 2016 – 57