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I wonder often, what do you all think of me
To suffer in pain, many would agree
I have fought back tears, crying for endless days
Looking out into the wonder, as I sit and gaze
All those words you said to me, I am unable to forget
All them lies you spoke that caused me upset
I did the unthinkable today, as I took hold of that blade
And thoughts inside my head, of being betrayed
It was easier than I thought, as I cut through that wrist
Not being able to hold me back, to be able to resist
The crimson red flowed, as I fell on my knees
The sudden feeling I have now, of being at ease
I collapsed upon that floor, for your words they were too much
All I wanted one last time, was that human touch
To be loved for who I am, and for my heart inside
Not for how I looked, as I finally came to die
My body laid there for days, as no one cared about me
No one to call me up, or to come and see
They said they found a note I left, on the ground next to me
Asking for forgiveness, to be taken to sanctuary ...
This was written back in 2007, when I was in a very dark place, trying to cope with lots of things and struggling both health wise, and mentality, with how I looked and felt about my life, loneliness, and disability.