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Waiting without end

"If I could show you how awful you made me feel, you would never be able to look me in the eye again"
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219 words 219 words
My trembling fingers flutter

Around the pulse inside my neck

I check for signs of life

Now that my promised life has left

My hands across my mouth

I hold the screams down deep

Yet sometimes one leaks out

In tracks of tears across my cheek

The emptiness grows larger

The cavern hits new lows

The deep grinds bones to dust

My fragile heart implodes

In platitudes and 'somedays'

In 'just be strong for nows'

The 'wait a little longers'

Infuse my neurons till i' drown

What is love but just 4 letters

What about the other 22

Hate, hurt, loss, damn and pain

Could just as easily be used

I can now fully understand

Why some escape the pain

Our skin is just a millimeter 

Of shield against disdain

So I rock myself to soothe me

I sometimes suck my thumb

I stroke my own hair lightly

From my nightmares, I do run

'Cause I'm the biggest fool

I believe the biggest lies

That others tell themselves

So they can sleep at night

And feed the vicious cycles

These beasts that crave my death

If they cannot have my life itself

They take my happiness

Its at night your absence taunts me

No more audience left in life

I've already replayed the chorus

When I'm done...

Turn out the lights.

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