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Felicidad 5: A Farewell To Arms

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Once again I find myself standing here leaning against a wall listening to the day’s sounds in the dawn’s dark light, as the sounds of chords being heard and then fading away as I vaguely remember how things looked when the day started.

Noticing that all looks different and seems I have no recollection of how all looked before as I stand here feeling all-right, and knowing there would be emotion(s) involved but nothing specific as I feel those emotions cross and merge with hers, making all seem as if there is a new evolution coming down descending like the blues do as I feel it fall like a guillotine. Oh, what a feeling and what a rush is felt as I feel it wash over me and watch it descend with these tired eyes, as I recall how how she looked in that yellow blouse she wore one early summer day as she crossed the flight line to meet me.

And had me recall the day we stood against the wall as the firing party’s bullets passed overhead and that kiss we shared, with bot of us knowing at that moment we would have nothing fall or fail that day and knew we could beat those self-proclaimed saints, and becoming each other’s hero at least for a day as we headed through collision and confusion and being rough and ready, and holding the line as we watched the approaches though there are times when it seems we put out to pasture by our critics. Yet she gives safety and sanctuary with each embrace along with the words we say.

With both of us having been through hard and bad times as well with her being right at times about me being crazy, as I feel the energy flow and can almost hear the ringing of what sounds like Temple bells being rung in her presence, which would be rung with an iron hand to be heard across the valleys and fields if they were real and not just heard by me. With both of us trying to make our way back to the holy land as all the lies are seen through when the laughter dies. And being tired of the resistance, false promises, and lies from those self-proclaimed saints quick to judge and their allies.

And there are the rare times when I wondered if she would save my soul or stand by me like I would for her and do forever, with times we should either follow the river or the windsong to see where the truth lies even if we argue and compromise, in separate but joined camps our conclusions are the same about many things as we recognize our respective similarities. Knowing that we both have had times we feel as if hanging by a moment and feeling desperate for truth(s) we can use as I stand here picturing her as my thoughts drift to that North Country Fair as we accept each other’s invitation, like that day we both stood on that small rise near her beach in the rain as the question was asked and her reply was yes. Still I wonder if she thinks of those things she would like to do or accomplish that were once denied?

As I think back to when we met not knowing that history would simply repeat if we played it out again for it was written, and I know are times she throws me like a rubber ball under those blue skies she has that she denies with a smile, being like those still waters we know run deep just like those winds of passion that blow from all points like a hurricane at times, with all being fair in both love and war especially in affairs of the heart.

Both of us have also waded through those lies in the shape and name of trust from those self-proclaimed saints. As she and I carried on forward sharing laughter, pain, and those occasional tears that fall as well through everything. For she is one of the very few who took the time and effort to truly know me just I did with her seeing things others didn’t, as the sight of the unvarnished truth about her beauty that radiates outward from within her which is the best and greatest kind. Which those self-proclaimed saints quick to judge and their allies the Blind Organizer and Jealous Monk never saw, just like they never saw the hidden truth(s) in the writings on the walls at that old prison at North Point.

As I stand here in the sun’s dark light hand on my heart pledging to take a stand as the breeze blows in my face, while I state my case here in these high desert plains in the heat and under blue skies as I think of her when we met. Committing my spirit to the test as we set sail across this sea of dreams knowing we can cross the ice or deserts of sand, to one day feel the winds of paradise blow with her knowing till the day I die I will stand by her as well as spill my heart, and hoping at times that she needs me like I need her though at times she can feel my darkness like a shotgun blast, that chills her to the bone yet she continues on and is: My Power, Pleasure, and at times my Pain.

Asking her to take these words and sing them out as I give her faith, peace and love while we live on, as the world begins again with what was said that day in the rain under grey skies there at her beach and all forgiven. Though at times we seem to collide when the dawn breaks as we both know that at times we both fall down at times. Not stopping here and I know you are not close behind but rather you walk side by side with me as you take my hand.

Copyright September 2010 – 7: Timberwolf International LTD.

Written by Shotgun011
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