I will never understand or heed
the voices bouncing around
and ricochetting trying to lead
Damaged connections and tissue
warp any sense I ever have of me
Self-worth not the only issue
Fighting with myself at night
Wanting all and nothing
I can never find the light
Value others see in me
Perhaps they are blind
And clearly, cannot see
I've just been cast
In a life I never chose
Each time worse than the last
Love surrounds me but no
I eschew and push it away
Each day a sad new low
Don't love me anymore
I'll poison you in the end
It won't matter if you're sure
Thirty years is enough of a task
I know what I do to you
Freedom is yours just ask
I can't stand the pain
That I may still cause
What do I ever gain
Making mistakes, being dumb
Is it too much to ask
For a friend and no longer be numb
In my brain lives no one
and many with no names
I just want to be done
To sleep and not to dream
Swallowing my pride
I always told you I was mean
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