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How Much Is The Doggie in the Window?

How much is the doggie in the window

There was a friendly dog. He had been looking for his forever home. An older gentleman who came in and inquired of the doggie.  The dog wagged his tail. He said, smiling, "Want to come home with me little guy?"        

Something is definitely not right. I keep trying to hop around but constantly am running into the lettuce-colored "sofa" as they call it. My neck feels awfully stiff, and I can only hop in circles around the coffee table. I don't feel very good. The big m...