Got a message the other day, and got me thinking that seems it’s all I got to try to take me back and possibly make me do something I wouldn’t do. And some things just don’t seem to add up to what my thoughts came up with concerning the message I received. Feeling that this might be the best of the time I have left and I know that old habits die hard, especially when reinforced by the old training I did in Georgia. As I s...

Smoky autumn night watching the ore boats passing by in the channel out near the islands, and mainland, and watching the water as the moon slowly rises up out of the lake. Making me pause, and begin to count the many tears I have shed over the years, and I know there will be a song that will linger for forever in both my ears, and head. Hoping that hard times will come no more, for I am tired of having rigged games being...

Standing here looking out on that Temple of Life again, and seeing what looked like a goddess rising from the mist of memories, having me recall the ballad of Cathain. Hearing a voice and seeing a face and closing my eyes knowing all is just an illusion, and knowing there are times when I can’t hold my head high and knowing too that some beauty was simply destroyed. Which at times leaves me blind and cold, like the surfac...

Be happy You command I try to smile I play pretend Be normal You order  I try to do it But it's not easy You want pretty I don make up You want funny I learn jokes You want support I lend an ear You want time I give all of mine You want aid I rush to your side But you want  And you want But I am just me I am not perfect  As you want me You accuse  I say sorry  You shame  I take the blame But I shall remain Faithfully your...

You have so many shades of blue I never really know what to do When the blues have gotten to you What shade of blue Has today brought you? Is there anything that I can do? Is there anything I can say? To make todays shade Of blue go away? Who am I anyway? Just a girl you let stay, While you wait around for her all day? It may seem unfair You allow me to care Yet you're fully aware You follow her stare You wish you were th...

Wondering if all was seen when it could be, and were things done that were needed, or were there things falling from my heart? And at times feeling all of those lies that were told in the disguise as words of trust that were threatening to tear me apart, like those subtleties that were threatening to strangle me in the past? Was time wasted in the wandering through those smoking fires of memory, and was control lost in th...

Feeling the time has arrived to go through the sleet, and driving snow across the frozen fields towards that light there in the distance. And feeling as if the earth is moving under my own dreamscapes, doing what I can to be there tonight. Knowing I don’t have much to offer or take and ain’t nothing nowadays like it used to be, and still seems like looking for the answers and the peace I haven’t found yet, with nothing se...

I try so hard I give it my best I try to please you I give you all you request But you are so loud  And so very self focused You are easily offended You think I talk to much You feel I don't act right You hold it over me Day and night My every action is observed I try to be perfect But you always seem perturbed I want you to love me Or like me at least But you push me away There are others who come first I try to understa...

The kids will be marching through the door soon to be off to fight in another war, and will have plenty of tales to tell in exchange for getting a hero’s farewell being given to them. And I wish they would discern what Lenin once said about patriotism being the last refuge of a scoundrel, as they walk in time to the tolling of the bells. Having me wonder if they truly know or realize that usually in most cases that heroes...

Out here in the desert sun making my way down the line and at times feeling as if every step could be a final one. And it feels like I can’t seem to stop the pain that is sitting there in those smoking mirrors of memory, which cries out in my mind. Still I am walking tall and standing up when called out, feeling as if I were a part of a new breed being ferocious and wild. Walking through this desert heat where warm winds...

They are going to betray you and they are going to forget you I heard them say once, and it’s one of the reasons I walk alone. And feeling like I am stranded like a runaway out in the vast ocean, so I walk on down the line making my way hearing the occasional stranger’s voice and looking everywhere, with the ghost of time and my shadow as my only companions. Feeling at times as if I were a primitive man and hearing myself...

Let’s pretend it’s not your birthday and I wrote this anyway, just because. You said you want nothing done and we both know that will leave nothing undone. You are also stealing my fun on this one. I promised to do nothing for your not so special day, but I hope this little note will be okay. I have so much to say, but of course, the words won’t come my way….Let’s just say, if I were allowed to sing Happy Birthday, I’d si...

Wisteria petals lately drifting down, The past renews, the city draws me backTo haunts, remembrance, loving aches resolved,And yet she still invades my fretful thoughts,A laugh that echoes off the stuccoed wallsTo fall among the steps we left behind.Tripping cobbled streets on skipping feet,That shared a space, embracing, dancing softly As a treat, a joyous, sweet delight.Forgotten meals were shared and lives compared Bet...

If there is no end, then there can be no beginning. And beginnings are very delicate things, with a lot seeming as if they are playing charades, and making life to be either their joke or pantomime and totally unknown of what can be seen. We all have one life and need to be living it, and not hiding away or looking back at that past that is not so far behind as we think it is. Sometimes feeling a touch trying to lead me a...

Woke in the middle of the night recalling once I tried to count the stars that wheel over head, and recall that I have heard a lot of laughter from him and them, and others as well as have seen and experienced a lot of pain. Seems I have been hanging on to both memories and time as I tried to run as fast as I could in the darkest hours. Trying to hold onto things but, they still slip away, here in this concrete jungle and...