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I Asked Them Not To Touch Me

“There are wounds that never show on the body that are deeper and more hurtful than anything that bleeds.” ~ Laurell K. Hamilton

My midwife first came to me and I asked for her, not to touch me. For I had recently been examined on admission and I was progressing as would be expected, for someone whose rhythms had been disrupted by the discomfort of driving to the hospital, and the...

Pine

Can we ever escape our dreams?

“Boy oh boy, it’s a hot one,” my wife exclaimed as she gave the sweating pitcher one last swirl before pouring each of us a glass. Exhausted and relieved, I sipped my iced tea while slowly rocking in the hammock of our screened porch. I savored my reward...

He sits and screams at nightVisions consume his dreamsFighting with no lightHe remembers all the screamsDeath all around Shells of bullets thereBodies on the groundEverybody saying prayersFear is all that's feltFighting all through the nightTakes his cant...

Flashbacks that consume my coreFeelings of deep sorrowThese images are filled with goreHoping I'll feel better tomorrowNobody could really ever understandThe pain that happened over thereThis was never really plannedOnly God listens to my prayersThough I...

Philena: So Tired

"Leave me alone, leave me alone, leave me alone..." -Otep, Jonestown Tea. Philena's POV

"Come here, 'Lena. Come over to your stepfather."  He beckons to me and I walk over, thinking maybe, just maybe, that day at the Zoo was a one-time thing. Maybe... maybe he wouldn't hurt me any more. Maybe he'd be a new Dad- not so much a replacement for...

An Enemy That Haunts My Mind

Recently published in a charity anthology to benefit veteran's groups...

Dedicated to combat veterans and PTSD sufferers, wherever they may be...thank you for your service... An Enemy That Haunts My Mind... In the middle of the night I lie in bed, Fighting an enemy that’s in my head. An enemy that’s always there, An enemy that...

Jennifer: Veteran's Day

Boss and Jennifer are the same person, but this is the 1st story before the Boss Spin-Off.

A year after coming home..."Mommy! Mommy, my girl scout troop is walking in the parade tomorrow, do you wanna walk with us?" Kristi, 7, runs up and tugs on my shirt sleeve. Her smile is so wide and hopeful, I am conflicted in how to answer her. I know wha...

Boss: Finally Home

This is one kinda from Boss' POV when she first got home from the war... Iraq/Afgan, fyi

(All of the "If You're Reading This"s comes from the song titled "If You're Reading This" by Tim McGraw. The letter was inspired by that song and "Letters From Home" by John Michael Montgomery as well as "I'm Already There" by Lonestar and "A Soldier's Me...

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Book Journal on Denial by Jessica Stern

a book journal... essay-like thing that I had to do for psychology... beware: disturbing.

Denial: a memoir of terror, written by Jessica Stern- experienced by Jessica Stern- talks mostly of Concord, Massachusetts and areas around it. It starts in the first couple chapters at the night that changed everything for her and her younger sister. The...

Fort Hood wasn't much different than Iraq had been. I laid awake listening to the war game's machine gun fire and loud explosions. Army helicopters hovered over my house because I lived next to the airfield. I was tired, my back twitched, my room was mugg...

Ghost

Acceptable collateral damage

Ghost I can still feel the ghosts gathered around me like ancestors in reverse, where the children die and old warhorses get older in their place. (Elizabeth Bear, Worldwired) I do not know why I do this to myself. At the end of the Vietnam War an estimat...